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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Cats are too much work... when they slash someone's face open

I'm sure most of you by now have heard about the Slider attack that happened last week. By request, I will give a summarized story right now.

Essentially I wanted to see how Slider reacted to dogs and my dad wanted to see how dogs reacted to a cat. We ignored a hundred years of cartoons telling us this would end badly, and mixed the two. Slider more or less just hid and hissed. This is the only time I've ever seen Slider hiss at anything.

At one point my dad picked Slider up and held him close to his chest. There were towels on the floor and he briefly thought about wrapping the cat in, but before he could make up his mind, his overly excited dogs entered the room and Slider used his face as a ladder. I wasn't in the room at this point, but I started hearing a string of curse words and "I don't know what happened" being screamed.

I walked in the room where my dad was holding his eyes and I thought, great my dad is now blind. Blood was everywhere, more curse words filled the apartment, and lack of communication followed.

See, I'm not a doctor. I see blood running down someones face I think "ohmyfreakinggodsomeonegetsomeadhesivestrips!"

He couldn't tell me what he needed because he had a brace wire tearing into his cheek. Eventually I gave him paper towels, wire cutters, and he Rambo cut his brace out and went to the hospital. Oh, and my dad is allergic to cats, so his wounds started swelling up almost immediately.

All in all, three stitches, a missing brace, and a lifetime of memories later I get a call from an animal control person. He essentially tells me he will have to take Slider into animal control for 10 days, there's no way out of it, its law. He also told my dad the same thing. I can only imagine how crappy the holding cells at animal control are. Slider would probably become a different cat. The best part is that we would've had to pay $150-200 for costs, even though my dad wasn't pressing charges and the cat obviously is a domestic cat with all of his shots.

The guy shows up, I show him all the papers on Slider's shots, and he says, alright I'll be back in ten days. That would've been the 25th of the month.

Sallie and I sat around and made sure people were here all day on the 25th and no one showed up. We figured since we had all the rabies paperwork, they probably didn't want to waste time and tax payers money on coming out here.

Well, once we got back from the baseball game last night we had a notice on the door saying they had been there all day. Essentially animal control is worse than the cable company. Where the cable company says they will be at your house between 7a.m. and 7p.m., animal control is more of a, we'll be there... eventually. Clear you schedule.

Now we get a call this morning from animal control. Slider has to have a chip put in him if he doesn't already. That's $10. It's the law. Luckily he has one.

However animal control still manages to slap some money on this whole ordeal. We have to get the rabies information and tag information updated within the next fifteen days. Essentially, pay them $10, and they change the tag from Myrtle Beach to St. Charles. Yes, its only $10, but its needless time and money for something so extremely pointless.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Dan,

I am sooo glad you wrote about this - I meant to ask you to do that and then Life happens and you forget things like that. Anyway I know all too well about the law. I tried to give Jesse a bath when he first came into grandma's house and guess what - He didn't want one. His back claws ripped the flesh off my right lower leg (that legs seems to get A lot of abuse) also had to go to the Emergency room and yes they HAD TO REPORT HIM to animal control. He had his rabies from Lincoln county and I too had to pay $12.00 to upgrade him to a Florissant cat - so you got off cheaper - cuz this was 8 years ago. You Gotta Love a CAT - GREAT STORY TELLING - I laughed the whole time your dad was telling it and I said Geez I hope Dan blogs it. THANKS for another Good Laugh!!!