First Home Cooking in Weeks

Sallie is recovering quickly. She's able to walk at a decent pace, go up and down stairs, shower, etc. Her scar doesn't look like it'll be too bad either. Thanks for everything everyone sent and well wishes. Sallie really appreciated it.

We've been living on road food for the better part of... well since we moved into this house. It's either been BBQ or restaurants for about six weeks now. Tonight Sallie had an appetite and I was really wanting a home cooked meal. Everything I made tonight was experimental but turned out soooooo good. So I wanted to share the recipes. Its a good light, summer meal.

This meal has three items:
-Light Strawberry Vinaigrette Chicken
-Sweet Green beans
-Fruit Salad

Vinaigrette Chicken
This is for 10-12 really small chicken strip breasts. Probably about a pound to a pound and a half.

1. Dump about 8-12 ounces of Balsamic Vinagerette into a bowl
2. Dice four strawberries into very small pieces, dump into bowl
3. Mix in a pinch of Jamaica Allspice and a healthy pinch of lemon pepper
4. In a container, mix the sauce and the chicken together. Make sure the chicken is coated.
5. Let sit for 4-6 hours.
6. BBQ until chicken starts to look a little dry. Trust me, its not. Its very juicy.

Sweet Green Beans

1. Cook about 2-4 slices of bacon until cripsy (I used turkey bacon, worked out great and was much better for you)
2. Dump a can of green beans into a sauce pan
3. Dice 1-2 roma tomatos into bite sized chunks, also add to sauce pan
4. Crunch up bacon into the same sauce pan
5. Add an eighth of a cup of brown sugar
6. Add a pinch of garlic powder and basil
7. Cook and stir for about 10 minutes

Fruit Salad

There's not much need for an explanation, but I found this combo works well.
1. Cut up a quarter of a water melon into manageable chunks
2. Cut half of a pineapple into similar sized chunks
3. Dice three small apples or two large apples
4. Halve almost a small container of strawberries
5. Drizzle a bit of orange juice on top and leave in the refrigerator for about 3-4 hours.


This was really easy to make and was soooo good. I really suggest it for days that are miserably hot.

The Waiting Room

It was all like some movie completely shot in slow motion. I entered the sterile smelling waiting room, seeing possibly the largest collection of anxious and high emotions.

Relatives were in the room talking, but I was only listening to enough to get by. Instead I watched as one by one people were called on the phones sitting next to their chairs with news of their loved ones.

A 96 year old man had no issues and the lady that brought him in jumped into the air yelling "Wahoo!" Others we're calmer, but making jokes the lighten the mood, not ashamed of their smiles.

One by one, everyone was getting called, and from what I could tell it was all good news.

Then we were called in. Sallie's surgery was just about perfect. She's expected to make the quickest recovery (still probably 3-4 weeks) and there was no cancer. Me and the moms immediately went outside to spread the good news. I didn't think I could smile any larger I wandered into the restroom where a 30 year old man was wiping tears from his eyes with a papertowel from the automatic despensor. He kept staring in the mirror as if asking what else he could've done for his loved ones.

That was it. I was quickly reminded that in that waiting room everyone was about to hear the greatest news of their life or the worst news of their life. That's why everyone was looking so anxious. They didn't know that was the reason, but deep down they all knew it. That's what the movies are missing. But I'm not calling Hollywood out on it. Its something that should never really be documented. The waiting room and prep rooms are a sacred place where a camera has no place. (Unless of course for a documentary where its a key scene)

Thanks everyone for your support, prayers, and positive well wishes. It really has helped us through this far.

Me, you, and your cyst

I thought I could handle these things better, but I'm finding out more and more how I don't handle them well.

We've been waiting multiple weeks for test results and plans of action to be set in motion and every week there's a new test and a new deadline. Sallie is slowly shutting down, finding herself in more and more pain and more and more uncomfortable. This means she's able to do less and less around the house.

I have no issue picking up the slack until she's better. But the fact that no one has a sense or urgency because this isn't life threatening is starting to piss me off. Its time for action.

I find myself having trouble sleeping at night. I deeply sigh trying to calm my body down, but its constantly going over checklists. "Have you set aside money for this? Have to pay that bill. We'll mow the lawn Wednesday before work and clean the house Thursday after work." I don't fall asleep until long after Sallie and I wake up hours before her. On no sleep, my body is on autopilot, and can't sit still with a seemingly endless list of things to do.

I know its affecting Sallie's energy, work, and moods, but this damn growth is starting to affect mine.

I haven't actively snapped at people, but I'm finding I like talking to people less and less. I avoid some phone calls just to have those few precious moments of silence. It's becoming a burden even to make plans with friends.

In between calls at work, where I normally hone other skills, I stare blankly at the days news. Stories don't make me outrage or smile anymore. They just give my eyes something to focus on for a few minutes.

The worst part is I know that I can't really take a vacation this year. Between the house and these useless doctors visits I've burned through almost all of my PTO. Sallie, by the time her surgery is done, will have no PTO. We aren't even halfway through the year yet and besides the few precious holidays left, we're stuck.

I just need some ideas on how to blow steam off. I've tried the binge eating. I've tried the extreme working out. I've tried keeping myself busy. I just don't know what to do with myself.

Surgery

I've written this post like 6 dozen times and deleted it after the first paragraph. Its a different kind of writer's block. One where instead of too few ideas, you have way too many.

So, its official. Sallie is going to have to have major surgery in a few weeks. We've appreciated all the positive feelings, prayers, and goat sacrifices for a speedy recovery. She needs it. Hell, we need it.

Its almost like we're taking a two month break from our marriage because she can't do much of what she normally can already. I've realized how screwed I would be without Sallie, not only financially (Cory could replace that part of Sallie) but emotionally. I literally sat in my cube when I found out think, what am I going to do? I don't know how to function without her anymore. It's scary.

We want to just get the surgery done so we know all complications are out of the way.

Its going to be a busy month.

Sallie will be laying around for a while. I'll be doing almost all of the cooking, cleaning, errand running, by myself. (Although many people have already volunteered much of their time)

I don't know... I don't really have anything to say. My brain is sorta mush.

I promise, a real post is coming soon.