Sonic Death Monkey!

Car Update

2012-01-24T11:48:00.002-06:00

So, the car drama continues, but we've made some progress. I just want to point out here that we still feel like no one is a straight shooter. I understand mechanics have a trade most of us normal people don't know and they need to make money. However, as with any trade or service, there should be some amount of honesty expected by the consumer.

I do not feel like Sallie and I have gotten much honesty here.

So, to recap, the first place we brought it to for safety and emissions wanted us to pay this:

- Swaybar is busted - $110 - A legit fix
- Side view mirror has a crack - $80 or go to a glass place and get a new one cut
- Battery - $120 - This was laughable. I can get a battery for $70 and put it in within 10 minutes.
- Failed emissions because they couldn't hook the computer up to the OBD connection - $300 just to fix the connector. That's not to pass emissions, just to fix the connector so they could run emissions.

We took the car to Nick. He was unable to fix the sway bar because it was rusted, but the OBD connection, he fixed with a piece of tape. That's right, a piece of tape. It's not perfect and he has a little bit of work to do still, but he saved us $300.

We took the car to a second emissions place, they said we failed because the check engine light was on and it was a manufacturer's code. So we had to take the car to... duh DUH DUHHHHHHN.... the dealership.

Dealerships are notoriously the shadiest of all mechanics. Unless you have a full warranty, they will probably screw you.

They turn the check engine light off and tell us to drive around for a few days and see if it comes back on. They didn't know if anything was actually wrong with it, but they charged us $75 to get the light turned off.

We bought a sway bar kit when we thought Nick could fix it, and thank God, the mechanics used our part. They said it wouldn't be under warranty, but it saved us $60 on the part alone. (First place wanted to charge $75 for the part, we bought it for $12.99 at O'Reiley's Autoparts.)

They then said they couldn't pass us for safety inspection because, and I quote, "the ball joints on the suspension are starting to show signs of wear." So first off, the ball joints are starting to show signs of wear. They aren't showing wear, they aren't worn, they are starting to show signs of wear. This car is 12 years old, the entire car is starting to show signs of wear, but it still drives.

Second, the other place didn't notice this on our inspection.

Third, they want $524 to fix this and said it will take about 3 hours.

Sallie takes the car from the dealership and drives it to the place we got our original inspection. Passes without issue. They even overlook the side view mirror this time.

So, we have now saved about $964.

The unfortunate thing is, the Check Engine light came back on today. Which means we have to take it back to the dealership so they can start troubleshooting our emissions system. Yesterday, they said the might require them driving it around for 3-4 hours.

So Sallie might have to use more of her PTO and who knows what's wrong with this. Could be as simple as a worn out hose or something not being as tight, or it could be a crack somewhere in the system.

Best Saturday EVER

2012-01-22T11:46:00.001-06:00

Yesterday truly was one of those days of marvel. The definition of what a weekend should be. We shed any responsibility for the day and just had fun.

Let me give you the run down starting with when I woke up.

8:00 a.m. - Got the coffee pot going, a nice Chilean blend, smooth, but rightfully filled with caffeine. The pot brewed and filled the house with its spiced luster while I brushed my teeth.

8:05 a.m. - I settled into the large comfy chair, opened up The Punisher #5, and sipped coffee while I read about Frank Castle killing a group of mobsters.

8:40 a.m. - Minor annoyance, I didn't bring enough comic books downstairs. I went to the office and grabbed a few Batman comics, and returned to the chair, where I soon had a cat in my lap, and one on either arm rest.

9:00 a.m. - Refill on my coffee. I realize that I'm living the definition of man-child right now. I put the comics down and move to video games. Against everything I've learned in my past, I put in Call of Duty, where every 12-14 year old that got an Xbox for Christmas screams racists slurs and calls me a cheater. I do however, have a very good session and end up winning 5/7 matches. Sallie wakes up at some point during this. She talks me into getting into the shower so we can go to the Schalfly Cabin Fever, a beer tasting festival.

11:33 a.m. - We leave the house and go to Schlafly. We're handed our sampling glasses, and start drinking the beer. We briefly fun into the guy who invented the Schlafly Wheat IPA. I thank him for his contribution of great beer to the world and he humbly nods and thanks me for the recognition.

Basically, Cabin Fever is a four hour long festival with 32 beers (you get to drink 18, 2 oz samples) where you wander around, make friends with strangers, have great beer, and stand by barrel fires.

At some point we're handed pretzles on necklaces. This is pretty much the greatest idea ever.

Sallie and I end up drinking the Pumpkin Ale, Southern hemisphere IPA, Pilsner, Coffee Stout (X2), Scotch Ale (X2), Smoked Porter, Singel, Quadrupel, American Pale Ale, Christmas Ale, Grand Crew, Black IPA, Blackberry Mead, Biere de Garde, American IPA, Irish Extra Stout, Barley Wine, Strawberry Cocoa Porter, and Chocolate Milk Stout.

If you bothered to count that, it's more than 18 beers. People stopped marking our punch cards after 7-8 beers. To sober up, Sallie and I ate dinner at Schlafly

We then headed downtown for the Blues game where our boys in Blue took out the Buffalo Sabers in a 4-2 win.

I sleep like a baby last night. The only fear I had as I went to bed was that I would not be able to re-create the greatness of Saturday.

Car Trouble, Know What I'm saying?

2012-01-19T12:45:00.000-06:00

I rarely hear people talk about cars in a positive light. Even my brother, a gear head, is always cursing his latest pet project as it drops him further and further into debt.

Sure, we can get around more easily. The car allows us to travel to different cities, see all the sites, not have to sit next to disgusting strangers on a bus. The suburbs are even designed around the idea that you will have a car to get from point A to B. There's no way you could walk around in the burbs and do most of your errands.

I'd kill to just have a nice subway/light rail system that could get me to anywhere. Unfortunately, the closest Metrolink stop is 4 miles from my house, and even then, it doesn't go far enough to St. Charles for it to matter most the time. That was my favorite part of Britain, there was always a public transportation answer to anywhere we needed to go.

Then there's the dreaded plate renewal. The time where everyone curses at their cars the most. It's a time where the godless find God and pray that their car is going to pass. It requires you to see mechanics (who I don't trust) and go to the DMV. (Who no one likes)

Sallie and I are going through that right now.

So we thought we'd be proactive and take the car to a place two weeks ago that could do both the inspection and emissions. We left it with them for a good hour and a half and when we returned, they had a laundry list of things they wanted us to fix. I stared at the grease covered man that refused to make eye contact with me as he read down the list.

- Swaybar is busted - $110 - A legit fix
- Side view mirror has a crack - $80 or go to a glass place and get a new one cut
- Battery - $120 - This was laughable. I can get a battery for $70 and put it in within 10 minutes.
- Failed emissions because they couldn't hook the computer up to the OBD connection - $300 just to fix the connector. That's not to pass emissions, just to fix the connector so they could run emissions.

I don't like Dane Cook, but he was pretty spot on here.

We felt like we were getting screwed.

So, I called Nick. He said he probably can fix the sway bar and OBD connection, and if we got a mirror cut, he could fix that.

So we waited a week for when Nick was off next, went and bought a sway bar from O'Reillys, and drove out to St. Chuck. Nick couldn't fix the sway bar because it was rusted, but he did save us $300 when he found out that the OBD connection was fine, just needed to be reseated.

Went to an emissions place in St. Chuck and they were able to get a reading this time, but they failed us because the check engine light is on and its a manufacturer's code, so they can't do anything to fix it.

So we're already out about $75, haven't actually gotten anything accomplished or fixed and now we have to go to the dealership to get this code read.

Sallie is taking another day off work to do this. We've decided at this point, we've wasted too much time. We're going to pay whatever ransom they hold our car at, get it fixed, and get new tags.

Usually, I think people are too dumb to take care of themselves, but this is one of the few times where I think there needs to be much less government. In this situation, a quick safety inspection and updated insurance should get your plates renewed. Emissions, personal property tax receipts, this running around to no less than 3 different places is ridiculous. The brief time I lived in Columbia, where you don't need emissions test, was fantastic. Everything was taken care of in two places, and we were done.

Resolutions - 1 week later

2012-01-13T15:27:00.002-06:00

Things got really busy immediately after my resolutions blog from 10 days ago, so the start of completing things wasn't looking so great.

Sallie and I did manage to go out to a new place in St. Louis that was on our list, the Scottish Arms. They obviously are a Scottish pub and restaurant.

We didn't get to the restaurant until about 8:45, which worked out because the people we were meeting there had been waiting 45 minutes for a seat and the table we needed ended up clearing about 10 minutes later.

Of course we were ravenous by the time we got to sit down and eat, but hunger aside, I'm pretty sure the food was fantastic. I ended up having the Berkshire Pork Burger, which is strange, cause I really don't like pork very much, and I can't remember ever ordering pork at a restaurant before. I washed that down with a Scottish beer I'd never had before, the Belhaven Wee Heavy. I tasted much like a Newcastle to me, maybe a little sweeter. Wasn't bad, just nothing to write home about.

Other than the 55 minute wait for a table, and the 30 minute wait for our check, I enjoyed the place enough to give it a second chance at a less busy time.

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Since insurance kicked me outta therapy, Sallie and I ended up joining a gym.

We went after I got off work one day around 8:30 pm, and there were probably 200 people working out. It was a sweaty, crowded nightmare.

So we planned on going in the morning on Wednesday (which didn't happen because we were so tired) and went this morning early. (Had to go this morning, Sallie had an appointment with her Greek, male, incredibly handsome, personal trainer. I had to just watch as he stretched her out, and massaged her muscles... well back to the story) Got a great workout in, I'm feeling rightfully sore.

The best news is I stepped on a scale (which is usually against my beliefs) and I weigh like 10-15 lbs less than I thought I would after so much inactivity and heavy holiday food. So Huzzah!

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On the house project front, I've been stripping paint from this bathroom window all week. We found that at least 4 generations of people didn't do this window right. Layer after layer of cheap all purpose paint, stretched by moisture.

I can't even imagine the chemical cocktail of deadly poisons that are probably in my lungs from these paints. If all goes well though, we will at least have the bathroom completely painted by the end of our 4 day weekend.

Resolutions

2012-01-03T17:47:00.003-06:00

I don't typically like to do the New Year's resolution, at least, not in a traditional sense.

The artificial time stamp we created signifying a new year has this weird effect on people where, while usually drunk, they make unrealistic expectations to become a better person.

While I fully support becoming a better person, most people set unrealistic goals and pile too many of them on to actually complete this. Sure, they might hit the gym for a few weeks, but generally, by May, those gyms are just about empty. Most research shows that only about 60% make it past the first month and less than 50% make it past 6 months.

So instead of just saying, "I'm going to get into shape and quit smoking" here are my more realistic goals.

1. Lose Weight
Yes, I know, a little hypocritical based on what I said above. But to me, I'm not going to say, "I'm going to go to the gym 5 days a week all year" Or "I want to get down to my high-school weight." I simply wish to become what I was before I injured myself. This is going to take more than just gym time and has several sub-resolutions.

1a. Workout
Just last week I started weight training for the first time in 4 months. Not working out for that long takes it toll on a man. I still can't do the aerobics I would like to do, but I can do certain sit-ups and arm exercises. I'll have to bust out my 25 lb weights and start doing at least a half hour workout a few times a week.

1b. Eat better.
Things have been so busy lately and I've been so tired just by the nature of my injury, that Sallie and I have just been eating what's convenient. We typically don't eat fast food, but its so easy to pick up some Taco Bell on the way home and not deal with it.

This is also true for dessert snacks, potato chips, and candy that have been left here from our various holiday parties. I normally don't eat that stuff, but when I'm hungry, I'll throw a handful of Cheetos and some brownies in my mouth until Sallie procures said fast food.

1c. Posture
My posture has never been great, but spending the past few months mostly sitting down has made it even worse. I noticed this in pictures from holiday events. My neck might as well just come out of my chest.

Not only does a better posture make you look skinnier, but it strengthens your abs and helps with back problems.

2. Languages
I want to have a basic knowledge of another language.

I have the foundation for Spanish, but I always found Spanish to be sort of boring and ugly. So I'm abandoning the six semesters of Spanish I took in high-school and college.

I'm thinking French might be the way to go. With how much I love cooking and how often the French come up in cooking, it's only natural. Plus, next time I go to Europe, France is on the short list of places we want to visit. Now, I'm not planning on being able to have a conversation in French, but I want to have a basic working knowledge: "Where's the restroom?" "Another bottle of wine please." "We saved your asses in World War II." Phrases that will come up often.

3. Frugality
Sallie and I have been forced to be fairly frugal the past several years, but we still have a lot of luxuries we could do away with.

July is marked on our calendars for when all three of our surgeries will be paid off as well as a personal loan we got from our credit union 2 years ago. By May, the sewer company debacle will be paid off. That'll free up almost $500 a month, but until then, its time to tighten the belts and get aggressive on some of our debt.

I've taken a few steps to save money immediately.
3a. Gamefly, although was a great and relatively in-expensive service, has been cancelled.
3b. We will probably turn Netflix to the streaming only option.
3c. We're also going to close off parts of the house that we don't use much, make sure nothing is left plugged in, plant some bushes in front of our house, plug up our fireplaces, etc. Just do things that will shave a few dollars off of our utility bills.
3d. Go out less. Sallie and I are huge foodies, which will make this one hard, but we are going to try and cut down on going out to eat by at least 10%.

4. Make our living quarters ours
We've kept putting off home improvement stuff for money reasons, time reasons, laziness reasons, but that list just keeps getting longer and nothing is getting done about it.

So to start, Sallie and I are taking a 4 day weekend in mid-January and we are going to strip and paint the upstairs bathroom and the future site of the Story office. (Large upstairs bedroom)

Once it gets a little closer to spring, the yard is going to get seeded and we're going to grow proper grass and try to choke out the crab grass.

And this will be the third time making this promise, but this year, we will have a fully functional garden.

5. Take last years resolutions a step further
This is part of my building on last years complete-able resolutions.

5a. Become more than an amateur baker. Last year, I wanted to know how to make bread in an old fashioned sense. I wanted to kneed the dough with my bare hands, not use any machinery other than the oven. But I still rely on recipes.

This year, I want to come up with some of my own bread recipes. Not only that, but I want to expand my baking into other realms like cakes and pies.

5b. Become a brewmaster. Well, that's really the ultimate goal. I'd love to be a brewmaster at a brewery. I know how beer is made now. I've gone 8 or so recipes. This is the year that I start making my own recipes, modifying ones I find, and once I'm able to walk again, I'm going to try to get an apprenticeship at one of the local breweries around here so I can see how beer is made in large quantities.

6. See more of St. Louis
I love my city. When people come into town, I want to show them why this city is so under-rated. At the same time, I feel like Sallie and I go to the same dozen places over and over again.

Our goal this year is to eat at each of the places on the St. Louis originals list at least once. We want to participate in community events more whether through a church or a local institution like Schlafly. and in general just get out more. Go for walks downtown, take advantage of Forest Park, or explore areas we've barely been to.

Just Testing

2011-12-19T19:14:00.004-06:00

I moved my blog to Google +. I don't believe it should break the email's, but could someone respond to this and let me know you still got it.

A 2011 Retrospective

2011-12-19T19:01:00.001-06:00

Google did a badass year in review that tugs at all the right heartstrings and made me realize how much happened this year while I was laid up on a couch and totally drugged out of my mind. If you didn't see it, here it is.

Now we're all going to take a completely self indulgent trip through my 2011 where I put the most significant events of my year in a list.

1. Leg break, ligaments torn, hamstring shot, painkillers - This really is the no brainer. It single handedly derailed four and a half months of my 2011. I'm only now getting to the point of "normal" physically, but the financial strain of this injury will be felt for most of 2012.

This has once again highlighted that Sallie and I will survive whatever is thrown at us, and we're had more thrown at us than tomatos are thrown at the La Tomatina Festival.

2. Blues winning - As superficial as this sounds, I want you to step back for a moment, think about your sports team. You probably like the Cardinals, or maybe the Mizzou Tigers, or a team that hasn't been rebuilding itself for 6 years thanks to the complete abandonment by the ownership.

The Blues have been losing for years now and to finally see them start winning and get the respect of the media (they were on the main page of STLToday.com today) makes life seem so much better.

3. Skyrim launches - This one none of you probably care about. It's pretty much the best videogame franchise ever. In total, I've probably sunk a good 350 hours into this franchise and the new game was by far the best.

4. The Occupy Movements - Whether you agree with the movements, don't agree, or don't exactly know what their purpose is, they were very much a large part of everyone's lives this year. With the European economy collapsing, the American economy plateauing at a much weaker level, and the Chinese smiling as pretty much everyone except them falls apart, its obvious something needs to be done about the current financial state the world is in, and more than anything, this is what this protest will probably be known for 50 years from now.

5. Osama Bin Laden and Gaddafi are assassinated/Kim Jong Il dies - It's one of those awkward and rare events when someone that has been an enemy of your state for so long dies. On one hand, you feel happy because the monster is dead. But there's also that pit in the back of your mind that worries about the power struggle to replace them. Who takes over? Will they be more aggressive? Most of these deaths are too fresh to really tell, but 2012 will provide some insight on the future of these people's followers.

6. Going to Britain - Although Britain and America are very similar, it's still an incredible learning experience going to another country. What I've learned is, we're all human. No matter where you are, your politicians are lying scumbags, you were the heroes in World War II, and everyone likes a good beer.

7.Sweet Chili Sauce - I'd never had this delicious Asian sauce before and we actually discovered it only a few months ago when making a recipe that called for it. It goes on everything now. Sweet Chili Sauce is the new honey mustard, which used to be the new ketchup. We just got a recipe to make this delicious sauce, and if it turns out, I will be filling bathtubs with it and washing myself in its gooey awesomeness.

I'm sure I missed some stuff. I'm having a hard time even remembering the first part of this year because everything has been so injury focused. Here's to 2012, a year of hope, of debts paid, and depending on which cult you talk to, the possible end of the world.

Injury Update

2011-12-15T11:10:00.002-06:00

Went to the doctor today and it was mixed news.

So I have to wear this stupid leg brace for another two months since I don't have enough muscle to protect me if I were to trip. So that sucks.

I will also continue going to therapy well into next year much to the dismay of both Sallie and I. It's not that I don't notice how much its helping, its just after 3 months of going multiple times a week, you start feeling like you don't get any down time. On days I have therapy, I literally have only 30 minutes between when I get out of the shower and when I start working.

The good news is my ligament has re-attached and is healing. So I won't need a third surgery.

The doctor says I should be walking normal by February and I'll be able to ice skate by next winter. So even though I miss out on my favorite activities this winter, at least I know I'll be better by next.

I Am Me Because I Was 8

2011-12-06T17:55:00.004-06:00

The longer I stay married to Sallie, the more I realize how much our childhood shapes who we turn out to be.

For instance, even when its 5 degrees outside, the wind is howling, and Sallie is freezing her poor circulatory butt off, she still needs a fan to sleep. Even if I'm so cold, I'm shaking the bed from my teeth chattering and I can't sleep, that fan has to be running. It's such a necessity that she brings fans on vacation with her.

I've been told I can thank Papa Hickle for that one.

Or because Matt trapped Sallie under a sleeping bag and wouldn't get off of her when they were young, Sallie can't stand the feeling of being restrained.

My family was always big on tucking the corners of the sheets into the bed, but the first time I made the bed when Sallie and I were married, she pulled those blankets out so quickly I questioned if I ever made it in the first place.

Or me with milk. Thanks to my mom, I can't drink milk unless its 2% and from my fridge. Logically, I know that my milk was right alongside all the other cartons of milk in the grocery store, but if I go to your house and you offer me a glass, I will not drink it. I can't even think about drinking milk from a restaurant without the ole' gag reflex starting up.

Then there's things that I never did as a kid, but find myself doing now. My dad was legendary for screaming "GOAAAAAAAAAALLLLL!!!" and rattling the windows in the house whenever the Blues scored.

I loved the Blues as a kid, but never picked up that tradition. Then I stopped following the Blues throughout highschool. You know, something my father loves, I gotta rebel because parents just don't understand me, and I hate them, and I'm running away from home. I was also busy quite unsuccessfully chasing women.

Then college came, and I got a bit busy with school and work and only slightly more successful at chasing women. So there was no time for hockey.

Started watching it again when we moved back to St. Louis a few years ago. And knee jerk reaction, and much to Sallie's dismay, I find myself screaming whenever the Blues score. It's not always "GOOAAAAALLL!!!!" like my father. Sometimes for particularly impressive goals like the one below, I tend to blurt out, "oh, SHIT!" Emphasis on the curse word. This drives Sallie nuts. She always thinks I hurt myself.

And then there's the picky eating. My dad is a meat and potatoes sort of guy, so our meals were pretty standardized as children. I could pretty accurately fill out a months calendar with what we were probably going to eat. Because of this, Nick won't touch anything green and not on a pizza. (I've heard he's gotten better.)

I'm a pretty open guy when it comes to trying new things. I eat Sushi and Indian food. I've had octopus and alligator before. I'm completely open to trying pretty well anything, I just might not like it.

Sallie gets angry at me sometimes because I will say, "I don't really care what we eat tonight, pick something." As she starts rattling off things she wants to eat, I check with my appetite to see if that would please me, and when it doesn't, she flips out saying I'm picky.

To me, I'm not being picky. I just wasn't inspired to make my own decision. I guess instead of saying, "I don't really care what we eat tonight." I should say, "Start saying food and I'll process that through the appetite filter, and see if its something I would enjoy."

Anyway, point is, I've realized how much our childhoods influence who we are. Don't know why I only now noticed it, but its become very apparent to me the past two weeks.

Wedding Day

2011-11-26T07:10:00.003-06:00

The night before the wedding, Rob sequestered himself to his own room to finish writing his speech and I found myself sitting around sipping fine Scotch with three Brits discussing mountaineering and walking the foot hills in Britain. I felt proper British that night. By the end of the conversation I felt I should've been saying phrases like Poppycock and Govnor.

The wedding went really well. It took place at an old Victorian Schoolhouse that's been converted into a hotel.

The rooms were like palaces. The Windows were 25 feet high and had giant red curtains covering them. The rooms had two floors to them, with the bathroom containing a giant bathtub, shower, and toilet upstairs on the balcony.

I was able to get around fairly well for wearing dress shows the entire time. Sallie and I weren't given the clearest of directions and almost walked past the wedding.

The register that did the ceremony had a fantastic script to read from. I don't know if it was his proper British accent, but it felt really intimate, was beautiful, and the right amount of sentimental.

This took place on the roof of the building. The moment that Lacy started saying her vows, the wind kicked up and the Christmas tree outside the doors came crashing down and all the doors busted wide open. Seemed to be the most perfect way for Lacy to form this union.

Lacy, Rob, Rob's father David, and Rob's brother/best man Richard all gave some fantastic speeches. Some of the best I've heard in a wedding. This also opened up the floor for me to re-tell Cory's epic speech from my wedding to the Brits which is always a great ice breaker.

Today my voice is just about gone. The Brits were in love with my sexy American accent and I often found myself surrounded by them, wanting to discuss politics and World War II. For a solid 5 hour period I was engaged in heavy conversation where most of us agreed, Bush and Tony Blair were sort of diabolical idiots, Churchhill and FDR were probably the greatest politicians in the past century, and depending on who's telling the story, both the Brits and Americans got their asses saved by the other country in various wars.

The night ended for most by 2 am, although there were rumblings of people partying later and someone over heard "butt naked" and "hot tub" this morning.

We're sitting the flat right now. Most people trying to recover. There are no less than 4 sleeping, snoring giants as I look around the room. The only survivors are me, Helen, Chris (Helen's BF), and I think Rob and Lacy might be in a back room counting their loot from last night.

I've had a fantastic time and want to come back and see more of England and possibly hit up Ireland, Scotland, and France. I'm ready to be back in the states and am mentally preparing for waking up at 1 am US time, fly for 9 hours, have a 4 hour lay over in Chicago, fly for another hour, and then take the Metrolink and car ride for the last 40 minutes. Our strategy is to chug Red Bull, try to keep busy by cleaning and preparing for Christmas decorations, and try to stay awake until at least 9 pm tomorrow night.

Day Out

2011-11-23T10:40:00.002-06:00

I wasn't sure how much time we were going to have to get out in Manchester since we are helping plan a wedding all week, but yesterday we were able to get out.

Around 1 pm, Rob, Pershing, Rob's father, and I went to the Imprerial War Museum where we basically got to see every killing machine man has come up with in the past 100 years. It was sobering, disturbing, and interesting. I went with intentions of taking pictures, but after the first two, the museum just sort of had that feeling of sober respect where you don't make a lot of noise and you just sort of stare and wonder how man is capable of such violent engineering marvels.

We then went out for Indian food because Sallie has always sworn that its very good but everytime we've tried to go out for good Indian food in America, it turns out to be a buffet and just alright at best.

Britain has a large Indian population, so I've been told the food here is fairly authentic and delicious and that seems to be a fair assesment. I couldn't stop eating.

It was then time for us to go to a real British pub to have some British beers. This was the part of the trip I was most excited for.

We show up to a place that merely says "Pub" on the window. It's brick and besides some renovations to the actual bar area, the building looks at least 100 years old. A train would roll over us every now and than and drown out our voices. I swear it felt like a scene in a movie.

We of course had the movie scene, pre-wedding, "Are you nervous?" talk as we sipped down a few pints and finished our time in the pub with a very smooth Scotch.

It was then a race for time. We had to get to a grocery store that was still selling beer so that our night could continue. We passed various drunken Brits running the gammit of every stereotype I've seen. There was the Sex Pistol's looking punk, the white trash Brit with the thick cockney accent, and the overly drunk Brit screaming things like, "Oi, I'm right pissed."

It was a good night.

What the hell day is it?

2011-11-21T05:50:00.002-06:00

We've made it. We're in Britain.

The plane was much smaller than we all expected, so I couldnt stretch out as much as I had hoped. The airplane food wasn't the worst, we did have kids all around us, but they were only weepy for the first and last hour, and I didn't sleep for more than 2 hours, but it was fairly smooth.

There are things that are obvious much different and messing me up. For instance, if you noticed above, I didn't have an apostrophe in "couldn't." That's because I couldn't find the damn apostrophe on this keyboard. Enter, pound, dollar, quotes, all of these symbols are in completely different places and its messing me up, but I digress.

The time change really messed me up, specially when I wake up. There's a brief moment of panic when your body thinks it 3 am, the clock is telling you 9 am, and you're on the floor in a strange apartment. I was trying to find out how the Blues did on Saturday night, but I couldn't figure out if I should ask them to check the score from yesterday or tomorrow.

Riding as a passenger on the left side of the car, winding through narrow roads, and making crazy right turns made the trip from the airport feel like a videogame. It felt like we were going much faster. Doesn't help that I couldn't do the quick math from KM to Miles. So I actually didn't know how fast we were going. I saw 50 KM, and even though I know its not a straight conversion, my brain thinks we're doing 50mph on these suburban roads.

We did a little walking yesterday, if for no other reason than for me and Sallie to stay awake. We wanted to stay awake until at least 8pm local time to sort of get over jet lag immediately. There were definitely some castle looking buildings and English row houses like you see on television, but it seems this modern architecture is dominating new buildings where you sort of stack floors like uneven blocks, so it appears that there's nothing supporting the floor above because it looks like its hanging off.

We haven't done anything touristy yet, but I do have a pocket full on Monopoly money and we'll be going to the War Museum shortly.

One of those days where life gets away from you...

2011-11-08T18:30:00.002-06:00

It's really been most the week. Things that are completely out our control that keep screwing us.

There was the whole debacle with the sewer district, who wanted us to pay phantom bills we haven't been receiving for 16 months.

Then, physical therapy this week was all messed up because my normal therapist was gone and they had some company meeting on Thursday. So I missed my appointment this morning cause I didn't think I had it until later this week.

Then, we were missing some bills that we never saw. These were for new accounts, so it was one of those things where we thought, maybe they just haven't gotten here yet. Turns out, they never got to us in the first place.

So it was one of those days where I just wanted to take my life back.

I had a few missions:

1. Hard drive errors on my home PC, fix that.

2. The wire mess under my computer desk.

3. Checks that we ordered and never opened 2 months ago disappeared.

4. Our downstairs closet is a complete mess and I haven't been able to step into it in 3 months.

So I tore it apart today.

I took my computer apart, cleaned everything with compressed air and a microfiber cloth. Reconnected all the wires inside all snug like. While I was doing that, I cleaned up the wires under the desk. Booted up, so far, no hard drive errors, and its clean.

On my lunch break, I thought maybe the checks could be hidden in our messy closet. So I went down there, put everything in a nice place, hung all my jackets, and set all of the shoes in nice piles. Didn't find the checks though.

So I was sitting in the office, just thinking about where these stupid checks could be. That was the only mission that was going to make me feel good about today. I turn in the chair and notice a giant tote bag with a ton of envelopes and papers in it. I never noticed this before, so I grab the bag, and low and behold stuffed into the side of it was the checks.

And that is how you take you life back...

10 Week Update

2011-11-03T14:43:00.003-05:00

Went to the doctor this morning. Says I look pretty well healed. Was impressed with how much I could bend my leg.

Million dollar question: Can I walk yet?

Sort of. I have to keep my brace on and locked straight when I'm doing it.

So not only is it super awkward to try and walk after 10 weeks of not walking, but I'm doing it like a freaking 16th century pirate with a peg leg.

So my goal is to practice walking as much as possible over the next two weeks before I go to England because I would really love not to bring crutches with me over seas.

In 4 weeks, I can unlock the brace and start walking with bending my leg. Then when I see the doctor again on December 15th, hopefully he will tell me to ditch the brace and embrace being human again.

The Christmas List

2011-10-27T21:20:00.006-05:00

I know, I know, I'm old and it's not even November yet, but I have been asked for a Christmas list from several people and this is the easiest way to do it. I love Christmas gifts!

Vinyl Records

-Against Me! - Searching for a Former Clarity

-Against Me! - Reinventing Axel Rose

-Against Me! - Crime

-David Bowie - Hunky Dory

-Brand New - Daisy

-Flogging Molly - Float

Books (Kindle versions can be sent as gifts to my email: djs9pd@gmail.com)

Resident Evil Archives Vol. 2

The Boy Who Loved Batman - Michael Ulsan (Kindle edition)

A Dance of Dragons - George R.R. Martin (Kindle Edition)

When You Are Engulfed in Flames - David Sedaris (Kindle Edition)

Medium Raw: A Bloody Valentine to the World of Food and People Who Cook - Anthony Bordain (Kindle Edition)

Tasting Beer: An Insider's Guide to the World's Best Drink - Randy Mosher (Kindle Edition)

Comic books

Criminal #3 - The Dead and the Dying by Brubaker

Punisher #9 - Long Cold Dark by Ennis

American Vampire Vol 1 - Scott Snyder and Steven King

Incognito #1 - Brubaker

Batman and Robin #3 - Batman and Robin Must Die - Morrison

Hellblazer: Dangerous Sins by Ennis

Entire original Punisher Run - 5 comics

Blu-rays

-The Bourne Trilogy

Brewing

-Sink Faucet Adapter

Video games

-Rock Band 3 bundle

-Ico and Shadow of the Colossus

-Dead Island

-Mount and Blade Warband (Steam)

-Cryostasis (Steam)

Gift Cards

Steam

Amazon

Slackers

Oh the crazies you see at physical therapy.

2011-10-27T21:10:00.003-05:00

Even though I hate waking up to go to physical therapy, it has been helping.

It's something that I get that immediate, physical evidence that I'm progressing. Everyday I go, I'm breaking another personal best. The first week, I went from being able to bend 70 degrees to this week, where I hit 108 degrees. I was at +4 degrees as far as straightening, I'm now able to get to 0 degrees. Only was able to do a half crank on the bike before, today I was able to do full rotations.

I go to the doctor on Thursday and I'm hoping he tells me I can start walking.

The entertaining part of physical therapy is the other people that go to it, cause they are crazy.

1. Gangster - A few times, there's this straight up prison gangster that wears like an Oakland Raiders jersey and baggy jeans to come to therapy. He did something to his back, so they have him doing a lot of arms. If the therapist says, let's do 5 lbs, he grabs the 10 pounder. He works out like he's in a prison yard.

2. The starer - It's hard not to start staring at something when you're doing repetitive exercises, but I found this creepster sitting directly across from me, his eyes met mine. He stared at me for a good 10 minutes while he rolled stress balls in his hands like some sort of Bond villain.

3. The Hipster - This guy is wearing his thick Weezer glasses, red blue jeans that are three sizes too small, and chucks on his feet. He's the skinniest guy in the world and they had him doing push-ups. I've never seen a hipster workout before.

4. The Gruff Old Man - Today, there was one of those old men that hates the world. The guy that yells at you for hitting your baseball in his yard. He spent the entire hour we were near each other complaining about how sensitive he is, telling the therapists what exercises he should be doing, and how everything causes cancer. The stretches I was doing... spread cancer. The stimulation machine... spread cancer. The lights in the building... create cancer. The therapist gave up trying to contradict the guy after about 15 minutes.

Quick Update

2011-10-17T17:19:00.002-05:00

I haven't had an update in a few weeks. There really hasn't been much to report.

I'm going to physical therapy now. I've definitely noticed an improvement in strength in my leg. It feels natural to stand on it again. So progress!

There have been a few times where my leg gets bent just a little too much and I get shooting pains. They've also started that electrocuting thing. You know the ab device that promises you six pack abs while you sit on the couch? That, except the medical version. The setting they put is on is called "Russian" and feels exactly how I would think a Russian electrocuted me with a car battery and dirty puddle of water would feel. Not pleasant.

Right now I'm going twice a week for about an hour to an hour and a half everyday. Eventually the physical therapist wants me to start going three days a week for two hours at a time. I just don't know how I'm going to be able to do that. I won't have a ride. Feel like its a little excessive.

I'm getting around pretty well. My upper body strength is getting insane. I'm probably stronger than I have been in a long time.

Other than that, there's not much going on. I'm working and hanging out, that's about it.

Blues!

2011-10-03T11:47:00.003-05:00

So went for my first all day outing on Saturday.

The Blues gave us free tickets to fan fest against the Dallas Stars. It was just a pre-season game, nothing really on the line, but they were doing other activities like player meet and greets beforehand.

Sallie and I got there at about 9:30 am and wandered around the True Blue store for a while until autographs started.

We didn't really buy much, but we did buy a blue Blues bandanna to get signed. It was only $9 and we figured it would look great on our wall.

So autographs started and we just sort of jumped in whichever line was nearest on account of me having to crutch around.

The first table was my favorite. It was the two Russians, Nikita Nikitin and Evgeny Grachev. They barely speak English and were just smiling and pleasant and signing anything anyone gave to them.

We also met:

Matt D'Agostini

Jonathan Cheechoo

Brett Sterling

Adam Cracknell

Ryan Reeves

Phil McRae (Who was the only one that asked about my leg. What a nice guy)

Unfortunately most of the players play for the minor league team. TJ Oshie, Kevin Shattenkirk, Vladimir Sobotka, and Bernie Federko were the big names but I didn't get to any of them until the lines were being cut off. It also sucked because Blues player was using a blue pen to sign. So basically, 50% of everything people wanted signed, this marker wouldn't show up on.

The game itself was pretty awful. This was the last day of the preseason, so they had to make roster cuts, which means most of the minor league affiliate was playing. We got stomped. The game was sloppy. But at least I got out.

We went and got Greek food afterwards and when we finally got home, my arms were shaking from how much I used them.

My foot and knee were incredibly swollen that night. I've been elevating and putting ice on them since. They're still a bit swollen, but much less so now.

This week, we have a Wilco concert at the Peabody Opera House on Tuesday, my first physical therapy meeting on Thursday, and the Blues home opener on Saturday. Going to be a busy week.

Recovery Day 42

2011-09-29T11:28:00.002-05:00

Just got back from the doctor.

Saw my X-rays for the first time since this happened. I basically have a titanium cage holding my bones. Looks pretty rad.

Doc says I'm healing great. Wants me to start having someone bend my knee to 90 degrees. Wants me to start going to physical therapy. He said I can also start putting 50% weight on my foot.

And the most important thing, he's 95% sure that I'll be able to go to England! If not, he says a doctors note will get me a full refund on my plane ticket. WOOT!

He's also been using me as a strange case in his classes. I'm like one of those patients on House where they have to figure out how the hell I did this to myself.

So great news all around.

Recovery Day 40

2011-09-27T11:21:00.003-05:00

Days like today make me almost regret having the windows open. I can see the sunlight, feel the perfect temperature and hear the birds chirping. I just want to go outside. These past few weeks have really made me realize how much prime time we spend locked in concrete fortresses. How many of these perfect days have I already missed because I was in school or at work?

I'm going into my sixth week since surgery (tomorrow) which means best case scenario, I'll be able to start putting weight on my foot in two weeks.

There haven't really been any huge breakthroughs in the past week and a half which is why there has been a lack of updates.

My upper body strength is as good as it was when I left highschool. Even Sallie is impressed. I've made sure to work out every other day to keep my endurance up and that's usually when I do my physical therapy.

It's still frustrating not to be able to get to things quickly. We've had packages delivered, the phone ringing, or strange noises coming from the cats and all I can do is sit where I am and hope that it wasn't important.

I've had improvement in mobility. Last weekend I was able to help Sallie with a few chores around the house. I was able to 80% cook dinner last night. I can get up and down the stairs (round trip) in less than three minutes now. So, I'm almost human.

I go to the doctor on Thursday for an update. He's going to take X-rays and see how I'm healing. I should find out when I can start putting weight on it, whether I need another surgery, and if I can go to England in November.

Worst case scenario, he says he doesn't like what he sees, I have to get that last surgery, and I'm stuck in this brace for another six weeks.

Best case scenario, he says I've healed so well that I actually have superhuman strength in my right leg and Manchester United is offering me a multi-million dollar contract for my services.

Update to come Thursday

Recovery Day 31 Another Field Trip

2011-09-18T15:28:00.002-05:00

I slept like garbage last night. Probably one of the worst nights of sleep I got since I came off the pain killers. I just felt really stiff and the brace felt like it was digging into my leg. I just couldn't get comfortable. Ended up moving downstairs after an hour so I wouldn't wake Sallie. Maybe got four hours last night.

So right now I'm pretty tired. I'm waiting for Sallie to get back from her run so she can make me a huge pot of black coffee.

We met with some friends at a local Mexican restaurant. Today, we decided to test crutches out. I've not been told by the doctor I can use them yet, but I felt that it would be easier to get around. It definitely was.

I was able to get up and down the stairs, we went to Office Max without issue, and then to Mexican. I don't think I'll be able to use crutches for everything, but it's nice to know I have the option.

We got a statement from the insurance company. All in all, total amount for surgery and hospital stay was damn near $150,000. That's more than my house is worth. We don't know what I owe yet, but I do know its not $150,000.

My favorite is there's a miscellaneous services charge that's something like $80,000. I'd like to know what is included on there.

This is my last day of disability. Tomorrow I start working again. I'm still not sure how its going to work. I'm still not sleeping and still feel like I need a nap just about everyday. I don't know what its going to be like when I'm using energy talking to people. To counter this issue, I've ordered a case of 5 Hour Energy drinks off of Amazon.

So hopefully, I can stay awake on my own the first three hours of the day, and then pop one of those bad boys to get me through the rest.

Recovery Day 29

2011-09-16T10:05:00.002-05:00

I finally hit one month after surgery. Best case scenario I can start putting weight on my leg in one month, worse case, two. The idea of another surgery is further and further from my mind now that I can actually see results.

I'm still not sleeping more than 3-4 hours at a time. Still waking up incredibly stiff. As long as I have this brace on, I think that's just how its going to be. I'm ordering a case of 5 Hour Energy drinks for when I do go back to work next week. There's no way I'll make it through a whole workday without.

That's another scary prospect. I haven't quite thought of anything that I can prop my leg up on from my computer chair. That's what part of this weekend is going to be spent doing. Trying to figure out the office set up for me. I decided that I will just work upstairs since I know I can get up and down the stairs if need be. I still plan on trying to make my travel up and down a minimal as possible. Going to stock the room with canned fruit, energy drinks, and other snacks.

The cats are driving me nuts. Crash and Newbie keep dropping awful poops that stink up the entire house. Newbie and Slider are constantly chasing each other around the house, making noise, tearing things up. And they both like to use my bad knee as a bridge to get across my body. I usually can catch them, but I've been caught off guard a few times when I'm sleeping and all of a sudden I feel 6 lbs followed by 13 lbs on my knee and I've kicked a cat across the room in response.

My leg is starting to feel more and more like a real leg. I have to remind myself often that I can't put weight on that leg.

Now I'm straining some of my good body parts. My knee, my shoulder, and my good foot are all feeling really strained. I'm having to over compensate obviously and its just wearing me out. I'm now wearing a knee brace on my good knee. It matches the brace on my bad leg.

Next week I go back to work. The week after that I'm back at the doctor to find out how I'm healing and when I can start using crutches. The week after that I have to start going to physical therapy and I haven't quite figured out how I'm going to get there two days a week without falling asleep as I work.

Where Were You?

2011-09-11T13:18:00.004-05:00

10 years ago, a monumental event shook America. It's the "Where were you when..." event of my generation. Still it makes me uneasy thinking that something not only that terrible could happen, but on United States soil.

I was in high-school when it happened. I remember after first hour, on my way to second hour, a buddy of mine, Bobby, came up to me in the hall and told me he heard an Apache helicopter had shot missiles into the Empire State Building.

There was an uneasy feeling throughout the school, but no one really knew what was happening yet.

My third hour class was Current Events. The teacher in there said that something terrible had happened and we were going to go to the cafeteria to watch the news. There were three other classes in there and the dozen or so televisions were turned to various news channels.

It was silent. I don't think anyone knew what to think or expect. Some people were crying. Less than ten minutes after arriving in the cafeteria, the first tower fell. A few minutes after that the principle came in and told all the teachers to take us back to class. I guess this was their way of censoring possible live events that would be upsetting.

It didn't matter. Every teacher (except for the math teacher I had) turned their televisions on. We watched the news all day. Really, after the second tower fell, there wasn't much "news" other than the survivor here and there and most the time, the chaos of the day caused that to be reported late or just rumored.

That night I had to work at Four Seasons Pool. No one came in that night. We just watched the 10" television as they replayed the same clips over and over again. Everyone took turns watching the front of the store while everyone else went and filled up gas, assuming prices would skyrocket. If I remember right, they did skyrocket that night while we were all taking turns. Going from $1.01 to somewhere around $2.50. They've not come down since.

I guess all we can hope for today is that the violence in the world can someday turn to peace. That needless death can cease. But as long as there have been humans, there has been war.

Recovery Day 20 Field Trip

2011-09-07T23:45:00.004-05:00

Sallie and I decided it was about time we did something "normal" on Tuesday. I was feeling pretty good, had energy, and the weather was perfect outside.

Sallie has not only been taking care of me, but she's quitting one job, starting two others, and basically not getting any time to herself. I felt that I owed it to her to get out and have a "date."

I needed to just get out to lift my spirits and see how my endurance would hold out.

So we went to our little neighborhood deli, grabbed some sandwiches, and went to Tower Grove Park. Sallie found a spot maybe 200 feet from a picnic bench, so we parked, and I hobbled to the bench.

I was taken aback by how much I missed the little things. Just the crunch of grass under my feet felt so different. The picnic bench was definitely uncomfortable, but I was also so happy to feel wind and sun hit my skin that they sort of evened out.

Still, I could only last maybe 20 minutes.

We came home, took a short nap, worked out, and showered.

We wanted to see how I would do at a restaurant so we planned to go to this small sushi place nearby.

We managed to get there, but there wasn't a parking spot nearby. Sallie dropped me off on the corner and went to find a spot. I of course was harassed by a homeless man, asking if I had change. I was hoping the walker would be an anti-harassment device, but apparently when you need money, you are blind to the world.

It wasn't too terrible sitting in the chair with my leg down. It was a little uncomfortable, but I just had to adjust my position often enough so that blood would continue to flow.

I quickly noticed how much people were staring at me. I realized that this was like one of those sitcom episodes where the protagonist decides to travel in a wheel chair all day to see what its like to be a cripple, except I actually was, and it was really weird. Some people looked on in disbelief that someone with a walker would come out to their local sushi restaurant. Other people stared with curiosity. They could obviously see the brace, but they couldn't quite see what the cause of my leg issues were.

By the time I got home, I was exhausted. The sushi was incredible and I was happy to get out, but I could've fallen asleep the moment we walked in the door.

Recovery Day 19

2011-09-06T11:09:00.002-05:00

There's really not much pain anymore, (besides getting the blood thinner shots to my stomach) its mostly discomfort.

I've got bruises that run the entire back side of my leg. I've got bruises on my stomach. I've got bruises in patches on top of my leg. Some say this is a sign of healing. Other's say its a symptom of the blood thinners. Either way, it makes my day really uncomfortable.

I'm still not usually getting more than four hours of sleep at a time. Sleeping in my own bed is definitely better than what I was doing before, but I feel bad, basically at 8 am every morning, I'm waking Sallie up so she can move me downstairs. Then, I snooze on the couch. I sit with the foot rest in front of me, and then bend the top half of my body over the arm rest to give my body the illusion that I might be sleeping on my side. Then after about an hour of that, the top half of my body becomes stiff and I have to move to the crappy mattress we have set up in the living room.

So sleep continues to be the biggest problem for me.

I've started doing some physical therapy. I like it. It's a way I can sort of quantify my progress. Already had one huge breakthrough, I can move my foot down on its own. Now I need to focus on up. I'm hoping that will come within the next week.

In a few weeks I will have to actually go to physical therapy. I'm not sure of the logistics of that. Maybe I'll have to find one that I can go to on the weekends. Otherwise, with Sallie starting a new job and me going back to work, I'm going to have to go really early in the morning. A prospect that scares me since I still have trouble staying awake all day.

Recovery Day 14

2011-09-01T15:03:00.002-05:00

Went to the doctor today.

I like my doctor. He's firm, confident, knowledgeable, but warm. Everything you would want in a relationship.

He seems optimistic.

He says things are healing well. Told me, a girl that had the same surgery (minus the bone issue) just went back to work after three months and she has a job where she has to stand all day long.

He hoisted my leg up at one point, out of the brace, and just started bending my knee. It felt so good I could've kissed him, but also scared the hell out of me because the last time I went there, the bottom half of my leg wasn't quite attached to my knee. It just sorta flopped around. Today though, for the first time since my accident, the bottom half of my leg seemed to be attached to the knee again. My knee even popped last night.

All my incisions are well into the healing process. The stitches should dissolve soon.

I still can't move my foot up. He's optimistic because I can move my big toe up and have decent resistance. He believes when the swelling goes down a little more I will start to get that functionality back. There's a small chance that I broke the little stem of the nerve that controls that. He says its rare, but if that's the case, I might not be 100% in my leg again.

He also wants me to finally start physical therapy. I'm more than happy to oblige.

I have to go back in 4 weeks to get more X-rays, and that is when we can start talking about a possible 3rd surgery and when I can start putting weight on my leg again.

The negative for today:

I only slept three hours last night. I didn't fall asleep until 6 a.m., but I got to see the sun come up.

I was dealing with the insurance company and Wells Fargo. Things look messed up. I'm probably not going to get paid this week. Figured this would happen.

I've also found that I'm losing total PTO for the year since I'm not at work. Normally I have 144 hours for the year. Since I'm out a month, they're kicking me down to 132. This officially cancels the England trip for me and if I do need another surgery, I don't have a week of PTO left for my benefits package.

The thing that sucks the most is after all of this crap, I'm really going to need a trip.

Recovery Day 12

2011-08-30T21:59:00.003-05:00

Today I had to fight with something I didn't even consider with the recovery process, withdrawals from the Oxycodone and Muscle Relaxers.

In the hospital, I was on something like 120-150 mgs of Percocet or Oxycodone a day, plus pretty heavy muscle relaxers.

The first week I was home, I was taking about 100-120 mgs of Oxycodone and about 20 mgs of muscle relaxer.

I decided last week I wanted to start cutting down on how much I was taking. Mostly because I needed something to help me sleep and you can't take narcotics and sleeping pills at the same time. I also wasn't feel much pain anymore. Just discomfort and stiffness.

Probably last Monday I cut my Oxy down to about 50-60 mgs and muscle relaxers to about 10 mg every other day. As the week went on, I eventually got it down to only 5 mgs of Oxy and no muscle relaxers.

I haven't had any Oxy since Saturday.

Yesterday, Sallie set me up outside for about an hour to read and get some sun light. She went for a run while I sat there and I remember feeling really emotional to the point where I almost wanted to cry. But I sort of forgot about it and went on reading.

This morning I woke up and was shaking. I felt really weird and extremely emotional. I would just start crying for no reason. I had no idea what was going on.

The only thing I could think of that would be good was to sit in the shower with the hot water running on me. So there I am, sitting on my shower stool, hot water running on me, totally crippled, when all of a sudden I realize that this is the lowest point in my life. So I start crying again, and then I realize that I'm naked and crying in the shower, which is my new lowest point.

Sallie had to go to work today and I was still feeling the effects of my emotional roller coaster. She left and I just sort of sniveled around for a while.

I'm finally now feeling semi-normal again. Everyday there's new crap I'm dealing with. Everyday my resolve to get healthy ASAP strengthens. If my doctor told me killing a puppy and rubbing its blood all over my leg would heal me two weeks quicker, I would do it right now. Seriously, this is lame. But, another week down. Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since surgery. I have somewhere between 6-10 weeks before I can walk again. The countdown has started in my head.

Recovery Day 10

2011-08-28T13:09:00.002-05:00

I can get along without pain killers now. The painful part of this ordeal is appears to be over, but I'd almost rather have it back. I slept a little better then.

Sleep is a huge issue now. The doctors said I can try to sleep on my side, but I need to stuff pillows under the bad leg to keep it elevated. I've done that, but then this plastic brace pushes hard into my skin. I get a few minutes of relief on my back by laying on my side, but no sleeping takes place.

I still am not getting more than about three hours of sleep at any time. It's really messing up my life. For instance, today, I woke up at four, six thirty, eight, ten, and eleven. I tried to wake up at this point, but I kept dozing, so I went back to bed. Didn't wake up until one pm. ONE PM! That's ridiculous. I've got to start figuring out this sleeping situation for when I do have to go back to work.

I think my other biggest obstacle right now is cabin fever. I'm getting it bad. Usually hits me by five or six pm. My chest feels heavy, I can't get comfortable, and nothing entertains me. I spend the next few hours bouncing between video games, Netflix, browsing the internet, reading, and playing with the cats. None of it helps. It seriously puts me on the brink of having a panic attack. The only thing that sounds like it would cure my cabin fever is a nice long walk. Something I'm still a minimum of six weeks from being able to accomplish.

I'm concerned that I will need a third surgery. Sallie and I were re-adjusting the brace last night and it doesn't feel like the bottom part of my leg is being held into my knee area right. There's still too much give. I know its still fairly early in the healing process, but it doesn't feel like any progress has been made with the ligaments.

I don't want to miss anymore work, or hell, the entirety of autumn with this injury. I've been waiting for fall for the better part of five months. I can't tell you how ripped off I'll feel.

Goals

1. I'm still trying to stay positive, but its definitely starting to get harder. I think part of the reason is because I haven't had any progress on my goals.

2. I was told that I shouldn't bend my knee this week in order to help the last scars heal on my leg. This is frustrating because bending my knee gave me some relief.

3. Knee and ankle have a little swelling yet. Sallie and I found a pocket of fluid hanging out on my shin with no where to go. I'm not sure what will be done with that. It might need to be drained, or it might just go away on its own. I'm still icing it as much as possible.

Recovery Update

2011-08-26T14:43:00.003-05:00

Coming in an out of the hospital, I've found different people on the staff at the hospital empathize with your injury more than others.

-Doctors - Doctors don't care about your immediate pain. They know how far they can bend, poke, and prod your injury before you start crying lawsuit. Then they order the nurse to pump you full of painkillers until you pass out.

-Nurses - Nurses are some of the best to empathize with you pain. The nurses would move my leg as slowly and carefully as they possibly could. They massaged parts of my leg, had me try different pain meds until we found one that worked, and would apologize when they did hurt me.

-Physical Therapists - Had a minute amount of empathy. I think this is partly because their job is to inflict pain and make you move when you don't want to. I wanted to move, but the PT guy still flung my leg off the bed quick and wasn't quick to get me back into bed when I was done.

-X-Ray Techs - X-Ray techs are the worst. When I first went to the emergency room, the ER doctor popped my leg back into place. It felt great. Went to get X-Rays and they wanted an impossible angle and popped my leg out of socket again. Then, when I went to get X-rays after surgery, they attempted multiple impossible angles, but jokes on them, this time my bone was in their way.

I'm still recovering well. Most of my wounds are healing nicely, I've got feeling back in my big toe, and I'm building some upper body muscle.

My energy is completely zapped though. I wake up in the morning, eat breakfast, and then need a two hour nap. Then, come dinner, I eat, and need to doze for a while. I'm not used to all the sleeping. I'm used to being up and doing things.

I went to the doctor for a checkup yesterday. For the amount of effort I had to put into getting out of the house and to the doctor, I would expect them to check everything. Instead, they removed my bandages, looked at my wounds, and said, "Good job." I have to go back next Thursday. Not looking forward to that.

Reasons my Wife is Awesome and Recovery Day 4

2011-08-23T12:24:00.004-05:00

I've had a lot of help from a lot of people in the past few days, but no one can match Wifey. She's had to deal with my every request, ache, and discomfort 24/7. Here is a list of reasons she is awesome.

1. She dumps and cleans my urinal without a second thought. This is gross. I would possibly vomit all over the disabled Sal.

2. Inevitably the moment she sits down, my body will start twitching or hurting and she will have to get back up and adjust something.

3. She's been dead lifting my leg, which currently weighs 5,000 lbs, to help me up and down on every piece of furniture.

4. She stands behind me as I hobble to the toilet. Helps me get my shorts off. Waits for me to be done with the bathroom. Pulls my pants back on. And somehow still finds me attractive enough to kiss.

5. She hasn't once lost her temper even when I'm in pain and can't tell her how to fix it.

6. She brings me ice cream once a day.

7. She's been keeping my pill schedule. Otherwise I would be laying on the floor from over use of muscle relaxers.

8. She not only let's me call her Dr. Salmonster, but embraces is.

9. She encourages my painkiller nap time each day.

10. If I moan like a beached whale in the middle of the night, she hops to, readjusts me until I'm comfortable, and then go back to sleep.

11. The normal stuff that is left over from the wedding: smart, good lucking, funny, blah blah blah...

12. She's in desperate need of some wine, but hasn't drank pretty much anything so that she can help me if the need arises.

13. Always serves my food first, even if she is the hungriest.

14. She changes my disgusting gauze everyday.

15. Her hair is red. Sorry, like to even out my lists and the painkillers are blocking my more creative answers.

Update on goals:

1. I've stayed neutral today, which is sometimes the best I can do. I'm not sleeping full nights right now. I'm getting 2 hours here, 3 hours there. It's not just how much I want to sleep on my side, but my leg is very stiff even though I stretch it all day long. The muscle relaxers help temporarily, but there's usually 4 hours where they aren't doing much work. My boot and my elevator pillow just aren't working right.

2. I almost hit 50 degrees. I don't think 90s degrees is going to happen by Thursday. It's partially the swelling and partially because I don't think this brace isn't on exactly right.

3. Swelling has done down significantly. Mostly still my knee and ankle. The back of my leg hurts the most. It's starting to rub on the back of my brace and not feel happy. Been trying to ice that up.

Recovery Day 3

2011-08-21T10:47:00.005-05:00

-----Warning-------This paragraph talks about poop------skip if you don't want to hear

I did it. Maybe only an hour after I typed my last blog, I pooped a weeks worth. It was glorious. I screamed out, "SUCCESS!" to the entire house. It was like giving birth. 3 cannonball turds, almost perfectly round. I feel a huge relief. So now I'll have to come up with new goals.

----------------------poop paragraph done--------------------------------------------

I haven't been able to bend my ankle or big toe upward since my secondary surgery on Wednesday. It was a huge setback for me. I had almost full range of motion just numbness in my toes.

So I've felt like that scene in Kill Bill since then. Keep saying to myself, "Move your big toe." But nothing was happening.

Today, I can move my big toe up maybe a quarter of an inch. I'm going to keep at it and hopefully will regain the use of my ankle and be able to move everything up soon.

Sleeping was a bit of a chore again. I like to not only sleep on my side, but change positions often during the night. I found myself wide awake and uncomfortable at 6 am. I tried changing the elevation of my legs. I tried holding my breath. Luckily, Dr. Salmonster woke up and told me it was time for more pain killers. Popped the pills and passed out within 15 minutes.

Slider has been overly protective of me since I returned home. He won't leave my side. When I move to the big chair, he lays on the coffee table next to me. He sleeps next to me in the bed. He's been cuddling up, wanting all sorts of attention. Slider has been better than some of the nurses I had in the hospital.

We had to break down and get a toilet riser today. It sucks buying all of this medical equipment that I know I will barely use the rest of my life. I know it will pay off for my comfort now, and I'm sure I'll find a way to injure myself in the future.

I now sit like a king, high enough that Sal's feet won't touch the ground. I haven't had poop round 2 yet, but I feel me and my mistress will meet again tomorrow.

I'm getting much better at moving around. I'm able to get up fairly quick. I've been doing laps around the kitchen to build my upper body strength. And I've been doing all the knee and ankle exercises. I'm interested in what news I'm given on Thursday for my followup. I'm hoping its good news. I've been hording all my PTO for this winter. Sallie and I had a lot of plans and we were finally going to take our honeymoon in England.

I guess my personal goal on this is to realize it was out of my control. I have a tendency to be angry when these events happen. If England doesn't happen this year, I have to just keep telling myself, it wasn't meant to be. There's nothing I could've changed to make it happen. If you don't have time off, you just don't have the time off.

1. Since I accomplished the bathroom goal, I think my new number one goal is just to stay positive. Know that people have it worse and one day I will be complete again.

2. I was able to bend my knee to 40 degrees again. The swelling around my knee cap has not gone down much and I think any more progress on my knee bending depends on that swelling.

3. Swelling around my ankle has gone down. The swelling around my knee appears unaffected, but there is now swelling on my calf muscle. I think this is because there is always some sort of plastic brace or elevation tool in contact. I started icing my calf tonight and hopefully will see results by Wednesday.

Recovery Day 2

2011-08-20T21:47:00.003-05:00

Today was a bit better than all the previous week.

I woke up this morning with incredible stiffness. Even though I had more support on our mattress, not being able to adjust the height I was at, really messed with me. Slider was passed out right next to me all night. He seemed to be a little upset.

I did manage to get off of my foam support under my own strength, but wasn't able to actually get to my feet on my own. This brace seems to add 30 lbs to my leg and then there's the trauma actually to the muscles in my legs.

Right now I'm on Oxycontin, muscle relaxers, baby Tylenol (for blood clots), and blood thinner shots.

I wish I could take the muscle relaxers every 5 hours instead of every eight, cause I do tend to get muscle twitches in that leg toward the end of the cycle.

Everyday, Sallie has to change the dressings on my leg and give me a blood thinner shot. Today, the swelling has gone down significantly in my leg. My right foot is probably where the most painful swelling is at this point. The scariest is a part of my leg puffed up so much, that at first glance you assume its my knee. In actuality, this is the thigh. It's pretty gross. Once those two things stop swelling, I'll be all around more comfortable.

Going to the bathroom is the hardest and most labor intensive activity of the day. It really wears me out to the point of my arms shaking, sweat beading down my forehead, and by the time I actually get to sit on the pot, I'm tired to actually go.

Accomplishments

1. Tried to go to the bathroom 3 times today, no success on any. I think I'm sending Sallie out tomorrow to procure a toilet seat riser. I hate that we are having to buy so much equipment that I'll only use during this surgery.

2. I'm proud to report on several occasions, I was able to bend my knee to 30 degrees. There was one heroic time when I was able to comfortably bend to 40 degrees. Taking it slow, don't want to injure myself more.

3. Like I said above, my swelling has probably gone down by about half. Once most of the swelling is gone, I think achievement 1 & 2 will become significantly easier.

Painkillers and Surgery

2011-08-19T22:54:00.006-05:00

So, Saturday night, Sallie and I decided to go out for a jog when she got home. We had both semi-stressful days and needed to blow off some steam. We were doing great too. What started as a mile, turned into 3. Only maybe 200 feet from where it happened, we were contemplating walking.

So I catch an uneven patch of pavement. Sallie and I were single file at this point and I had to roll to the side to avoid her. I don't actually remember hitting the pavement, but the next thing I know, the bottom half of my right leg was no longer attached.

The ambulance showed up, and the EMTs started freaking out. They thought that I would be in extreme pain, but really I was just uncomfortable. The EMT didn't really tell me where I was going, but merely said, "You're not going to St. Alexis." (Which is probably for the better. My only experience with St. Alexis was during Sallie's surgery last year, where I sat in waiting rooms covered in church pews and a guy kept screaming and peeing on the floor.)

So I end up at SLU's emergency room after they say they have some openings. It was a busy night for gun shot wounds and motorcycle accidents. I guess the nice weather brought out the excitement in everyone.

I end up dealing with the ER doctor, his intern, the two on staff surgeons, two nurses, X-Ray team, and the MRI team. It seems that none of these teams talked to each other. Three teams would come in in a row, all giving me the same information, or maybe another guy would show up contradicting the first guy.

The on staff doctor ad his intern both thought the knee was dislocated. They made it sound as if I were going home that night. I went to get X-rays, and the techs wanted to get some crazy angles, so they popped it back out of place in the process which didn't feel very good. The on staff doctor got it back in place, but then they decided they needed to get it wrapped. They lifted my leg and just turned it a bit too much. The leg popped out of socket again, the two surgeons were caught by surprise and dropped my leg a few inches, getting a better grip on it. This was by far the worst pain I felt.

This is what my leg looked like when it was re-set. You can see fairly obviously that the bottom half isn't attached to the top half.

So, they finally got me to a room at about 5 am, and I was due to be in surgery by 7 am. The nurse was scrambling to get everything together, and he did a damn fine job. Even with the nurse shift change happening at 7, he was able to get all the paperwork done and get me to surgery.

When I came out of surgery, I had rods in my legs. Basically, this was a temporary solution for keeping my leg together until the real orthopedic surgeon was in on Monday. This was the results of the surgery.

It was a constant battle of different nurses coming in my room 24 hours a day, a loud red neck room mate with a ton of family visiting all the time, orthopedic surgeons and doctors consistently cutting the dressing off my legs, poking around, redressing it. Halfway through the week, another patient was brought in as my room mate.

I got surgery round 2 on Wednesday. They removed the rods, put a plate on my ball joint of my Tibia, repaired the ligament on the right side of my knee, and discovered that my Hamstring was also hosed, so they fixed that as well. Total surgery time was about 5 hours.

I finally was able to leave on Friday. The transport to home just took everything out of me. I could barely move once I made it to my makeshift bed.

There are a few things I'm basing my recovery on.

1. When I can finally poop: I feel like I'm close, I have the sensation, but it takes so much energy and effort to make it to the toilet, I have no energy left. This one is probaby too much FYI, but I'm on too many pain killers to care.

2. How far I can bend my knee. My goal for Thursday, when I meet with the surgeons again is 90 degrees. Yesterday, I could bend my knee about 20 degrees. So I have a bit to go.

3. How far the swelling has gone down. The swelling has subsided significantly since I first got out of the hospital. Most of my swelling is right above my knee, around my ankle, and where my hamstring is.

Fake Money and Passions

2011-08-09T21:17:00.002-05:00

The United States treasury has been downgraded from an AAA to an AA credit and this has sent the stock market into a plummet.

Stock holders are a finicky, panic driven bunch. There’s this myth about the stock market, thanks mostly to the 1920s and the 1980s-90s when it was booming, where people think it’s an easy way to get free money. Invest in the right company, and shares explode.

It doesn’t make much sense to me, granted this is coming from someone who hates the business side of things and has no interest with investments.

All of this “money” is digital. Just because a stock is worth $3 more on paper, doesn’t actually put those $3 in your pocket. None of this is real money, it’s basically one large system of IOUs. Sure, you can sell your stocks high, but then that causes the price of the stocks to drop for everyone else. It’s this ripple effect system.

So yes, even though it’s scary to see the market plummet 500 points in a week, this is just going to cause a great buy-up when the stock prices go down. It’s a giant roller coaster ride.

Now I do feel sorry for the FAs I talk to. Even though I think the stock market has too much power and is a ridiculous system that puts too much power in the hands of stock holders, I can understand their stress. It’s something they at least at one time were passionate about.

It would be like if we started blending all food together in convenient shakes. It takes all the passion and romance out of food and cooking. I would hate that life.

I guess today I woke up with an empathy for the FAs I support. Many times I see it as a them vs me situation. Most of the guys I work with see it this way as well. Really, we’re all a bunch of animals habituating a spinning rock for a short amount of time.

Today, while being in this reflective empathetic state, I also realized that there’s no way I’m staying in the tech industry. I have no passion for it, just talent. I’m going to stay in it until my student loans are paid off, but then I’m going to write. I’m going to get a job at a restaurant in Denver, and Sallie and I will be blissfully happy.

With that, I leave you with some inspirational words by the man himself, Ira Glass.

Ira Glass on Storytelling from David Shiyang Liu on Vimeo.

The Checkbook that Won't Go Away

2011-08-07T02:19:00.002-05:00

So Sallie and I had this checkbook from Myrtle Beach that's been floating around since we left South Carolina. We had a reason for keeping this check book, a reason that I can't think of now, but this thing has caused too much chaos in the past few weeks.

For some reason Bank of America can't transfer bank accounts from one state to another. They forced us to close our South Carolina account and then open a Missouri one.

They of course gave us starter checks for our Missouri account that looks exactly like the checks from Myrtle Beach. I'm sure you can all see where this is going now.

First, I sent my dad a check for his birthday gift. The worst part about this is he even called and warned me that the check said Myrtle Beach. I wasn't thinking about it when he called and just thought it was one of our older checks from our apartment, but would still be valid.

Wrong: $20 charge and I have to send another check in the mail.

Second, Sallie had to go get a hair cut on Friday. This place, for some ridiculous reason, only accepts cash and checks like some shady convenience store. She didn't realize she had the old checkbook until she wrote the check and had left the place.

Not only did she have to call the place and tell them she was bringing a new check, drive home in awful Friday traffic, but then she had to drive back to give them the new check all before the birthday party at our place that night.

Third, and possibly the worst situation, I apparently paid for our water and sewage bill with St. Louis with this checkbook as well. Today, I got a notice that was stamped July 22nd, saying I had 10 days to send a money order, certified check, or pay cash at city hall otherwise I will be sought for immediate prosecution of a Class A Misdemeanor or Class C Felony for trying to defraud the department of revenue.

Here's the issue, we didn't get the notice until today, August 6th, which means we're already 16 days from the date stamped on the notice. We obviously have a post-marked envelope saying the notice wasn't actually sent until the 5th, but knowing bureaucracy at its best, I wouldn't be surprised if Monday when we went downtown, they tell us we have to go to court.

This checkbook has properly been disposed of now and will hopefully cause us no further grief. Here's my thought, let's get rid of the archaic check book system and make everything digital.

On a side note not related to the checkbook:

I was doing yard work today when I noticed a white shirt laying in front of my garage. I went to pick it up to realize that someone had pooped next to my garage and wiped their butt with this shirt. I screamed out in frustration. Luckily I had gloves on. It was just one of those sort of days.

The Scenarios in Which I don't Help

2011-07-29T21:11:00.000-05:00

I went for a run tonight. It was hot to put it mildly.

Like so hot, I feel like the sun had to be closure to the Earth.

There were a lot of people outside tonight, hanging out in the street, throwing balls back and forth. It was sort of a pain to run on sidewalks and in the street because of the sheer humanity.

There was one woman that popped out at me. She was small and sweating, dragging giant roller luggage behind her, and carrying a baby in one of those kangaroo poncho things.

My brain didn't register immediately what I saw. Instead, I went into a day dream where I asked her if she needed help getting her luggage to a car. Maybe she was kicked out of her house and slept on the streets. In either scenario, I help her with her luggage. Ask he if she needs something to eat, some water, and fulfill her request, one human to another.

By the time I realized this has all been going on in my head, I turned around. I had ran another quarter mile and she was no longer anywhere to be seen.

So mysterious lady, even if you weren't living on the street, I'm sorry I didn't offer to help with your luggage. To make up for it, I promise to at least ask if the next person I see that might need help, needs it, without question.

The Instruments of Yesterday

2011-07-25T14:00:00.000-05:00

There's a general idea that when you buy any piece of technology, it's already out-dated the moment you leave the store.

I've realized now, that technology I was using only ten years ago, it beyond me.

My land line is hooked up to my wireless headset for work. So every now and then when I have things to do, but I also need to make a call, I will call people on my land line.

The thing is, I forgot how to use the phone.

Like do I have to call long distance to call from a 314 area code to 636. And how the hell do you dial long distance? Is it 9 or 1 first? I've tried calling my dad on my land line a few times, but I always get this gruff old man, who's usually pretty nice and laughs it off. No matter what combo of buttons I press I just can't figure it out.

Then a week ago, I had a user call into my work who had a dial up modem still. I was flabbergasted. I couldn't remember how they worked or what steps to take to troubleshoot. Then I realized he was talking to me on his phone that he would also have to use for his internet. That became troubleshooting step number 1.

I've also been drawing up design documents for my brother's game he's creating and needed a straight edge. Where are all the rulers? I know that I own at least 5 rules, but since I haven't used any of them since my freshman year of college, I have no idea where they are hanging out at this point.

The classroom is an entirely different monster. There's no globes thanks to Google earth. There's almost no need to buy an expensive set of encyclopedias. You'd be hard pressed to even find a pair of headphones. Everyone has ear buds nowadays.

Maybe I'm just noticing all this stuff because I'm turning 27 this week. Birthdays always being out a reflective time, but damn. My 10 year old self would freak out not having a chalk board in school.

Food Porn

2011-07-24T20:48:00.003-05:00

Cory and I (and Sal) have been watching a lot of cooking shows lately, specifically Gordon Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares where Gordon goes into a restaurant filled with his Ramsey attitude and whips them into shape.

Cory came to me about a week ago with a proposition. We make ribs and come up with a fancy compliment to the ribs.

I was excited. With Sallie's schedule and our off duty obligations, we haven't really spent any time together, and what time we do have, we don't want to spend cooking.

So a reason to get in the kitchen and make things is something I was willing to fully embrace.

I like how Cory's mind works. He came up with the ribs idea and before any other sides were brainstormed, he wants dessert to be Oreo's baked inside of chocolate chip cookies.

So we had ribs and double cookies. I suggested an oriental salad with home made dressing, green bean casserole, and something potato related.

So Cory and I had never made ribs before. I found a dry rub recipe that we ended up modifying that had a mix for fajita seasonings and brown sugar and a few other ingredients.

We didn't want to just get ribs from anywhere. This being the centerpiece of a great meal, we wanted real, straight from a local butcher, ribs.

So skipping the boring parts, our dinner took us to the nice grocery store, the International market, and our local butcher.

I made a sweet and sour home made dressing and cut the lettuce for the oriental salad. We made some fancy French potatoes with heavy cream, black olives, and goat cheese. Something a little simple but still delicious, a green bean casserole. And Cory's cookies.

The ribs were the big question mark. Neither of us have ever made them before and it was going to take 3-4 hours to slow cook them on the grill. To complicate matters, the grill ran out of propane around the 3 hours mark, and we had to play the oven merry-go-round with essentially all of the food to get everything cooked.

Surprisingly, the meal came out fantastic. (Including the cookies) I'm now laying in bed in my underwear feeling full.

Neighbor Politics

2011-07-14T22:19:00.002-05:00

So, I don't really care for my next door neighbor. I think I've told everyone that by now. They are racist, pompous, and think everyone is out to get them.

Seriously, in the few times I've had to interact with them, they think the cops are out to get them, the criminals are out to get them, the teenagers, the government, everyone! They've complained about our Vietnamese neighbors (that I love), the red necks on the corner, and the person on the other side of them because they have more than one car. (BTW: These neighbors have 3)

They've also built their house as an isolationist castle. High fences, a porch roof that covers their entire back yard, cameras, and locks that supposedly can't be picked. Even police officers have made fun of this house set up. It makes our neighborhood look dangerous.

I don't really care for them much. I can tell they don't really care for me. We sort of co-exist I guess, try not to make eye contact.

It's a shame because I remember when I was a kid, all of the neighbors would wander to someone's driveway every Friday and Saturday night and hang out, have a great time. I don't know anyone that has that anymore. There's some sort of neighborly distrust that has grown in the past decade.

So tonight, I'm cleaning the house. I hear someone mowing their lawn and weed whacking. It's 9:20, and I sort of think... maybe its a little late for that. But I'm too busy to investigate.

Then, as I'm going up the stairs at 9:45, I look out the window on our door, and the neighbor kid is week whacking my front yard. He's actually on my front porch going for it.

Now, I don't have an issue with the kid. I actually could see him being alright to hang out with. I would like to think that he's doing this to be a good neighbor. I was planning on mowing my lawn tomorrow morning before work anyway and I ran out of the string in my weed whacker last weekend. So really, he's doing me a favor.

But then I'm also wondering if his parents have been talking trash on us because our yard isn't as perfectly landscaped as their yard is. (Mostly because we haven't lived in this house for 20 years and don't have a bunch of money to do that stuff professionally.) Maybe the kid was tired of hearing it and he decided to take matters into his own hands? Maybe his father mentioned it makes their house look worse and told him to do it.

But see, there's that neighbor distrust again. I don't know where this came from. I've never had horrible neighbors and even as recently as college I remember hanging out with all of my neighbors and actually liking them.

Is this a product of our electronic lives? Possibly a product of the suburbs and everyone wanting the largest piece of land they can get? Whatever it is, I hate it. I really wish there were neighbors willing to come outside on Friday and have a beer with me.

The Yearly Birthday List

2011-07-09T17:17:00.006-05:00

Yes, I'm still going to put up birthday lists because I love getting gifts and people love giving them to me. These are in no particular order and I want them all. So start buying. Only 16 shopping days left.

Comic books

1. Walking Dead Vol. 14 by Robert Kirkman

2. Criminal: Lawless Vol. 2 by Ed Brubaker

3. Criminal: The Dead and the Dying Vol. 3 by Ed Brubaker

4. Batman and Robin Vol. 2: Batman vs Robin by Grant Morrison

5. Batman and Robin Vol. 2: Robin Must Die by Grant Morrison

6. Captain America: Winter Soldier Complete Collection by Ed Brubaker

7. Captain America: No Escape by Ed Brubaker

8. Captain America: The Man Without a Face by Ed Brubaker

9. The Punisher Max Vol. 8: Widowmaker by Garth Ennis

Videogames

1. The Punisher - Playstation 2

2. Silent Hill 4: The Room - Playstation 2

3. Tenchu 2 - Playstation 1

4. Intelligent Qube - Playstation 1

Computer Stuff

1. Rat7 Gaming Mouse

2. Killler Solar Keyboard

3. Drawing Tablet

Movies

1. Borne Trilogy - Blu-ray

2. Walking Dead - Blu-ray

Home Brewing Equipment

1. Wort Chiller

2. Bottle tree

3. Sink Adapter

Gift Cards

1. Steam

2. Amazon

3. Slackers

4. Gamestop

5. Microcenter

There's a New Kitten in Town

2011-07-07T10:34:00.003-05:00

Sallie sent out a recon team in search for a little orange or calico cat. One of her recon members, Beth, found a little orange cat a few days ago.

Immediately my phone rings like the president. You would think the Russians were attacking and I had to make a quick decision.

"Can I have him?" aka "They have nukes in Cuba. What's our next move President?"

"Have there been any threats yet?" aka "How small is it? How much will it cost me?"

"No, but there's potential for an attack." aka "No they're free, from a farm, and we're in real danger of a cuddle attack."

"Do we have any intelligence?" aka "Has it been to the vet?"

"None yet, we're working on it. An attack could happen soon..." aka "Not yet, but I will take it there before we get it. My birthday is coming up soon..."

After several seconds of heavy thought. "Alright, we'll launch an attack." aka After several seconds of heavy thought. "Alright, call Beth and get it under way."

So the little guy is home and hate to say, so adorable, he can get away with murder. I've never thought about what it would be like to have a super small guy.

I've also discovered how much of a selfish father I would be.

The first night we had him, he cried and woke us up at 3 am, 5 am, 7:30 am, and 8:30 am with his cries. It was my one day a month I had to go to the office and I was tired.

Last night... oh last night was even better. He slept in bed with us. Totally tuckered out. We were tuckered as well. But we couldn't go to bed yet because lil' oh kitten peed on our comforter. So we swapped all the blankets out, put them in the washer, and finally curled up in bed.

Then 5 am came around and I hear Sallie wake up because the new kitten is jumping around, playing with a toy and spray peeing and pooing everywhere. So, we drop him in the litter box, where he finished up. I take all the second round of blankets and put them in the washer while Sallie changes out to our C blankets. Also known as, the last full set we have.

So he spent the rest of the night in the cage.

Slider is warming up to the little guy. They will play together, but eventually a 10 lb slider will inevitably bowl over a 1.6 lb kitten. They'll eventually get it.

Crash of course hates him, but to be fair, she still hates Slider... and most other people.

We don't have a name for him yet. I've had a few ideas.

Winston Zeddimore because I love Ghostbusters and he is the most under-appreciated buster around. It would be a tribute to a man that helped take down the Stay Puff Marshmellow man and Viggo the Carpatheon.

Dobby from Harry Potter because he has giant elf ears. But I don't want to have a Harry Potter reference 20 years from now when he might not be as cute.

He loves technology. Anytime I'm playing a game, he's laying on the keyboard or watching the TV. He's been hanging out on top of my game collection to keep away from slider. He even likes chewing on the laptop monitor. So I though, hmmm, maybe we could call him Gamer. I'm putting that in the bank because I think I would like that more than others.

He also keeps climbing on my brewing beer, which means he basically likes everything I like. So maybe we could call him Dan... but come on, animals are there so you can give them messed up names you couldn't give to a human baby. So Dan is right out.

We'll figure out a name soon enough I'm sure. Sallie will update you when we do.

Wait... You Did What?

2011-07-05T10:40:00.003-05:00

So my friend Allie is in graduate school to be some sort of medical professional.

She keeps blowing my mind by causally mentioning stuff she has to do.

So the first instance, while we were talking on the phone, she just drops this bomb in the middle of the conversation.

"So yeah, we were in the lab, and they were asking for volunteers, and no one wanted to do it, so I volunteered and had to cut the cadaver's chest open with a bone saw, and when it was done, my professor..."

"Wait, you freaking cut a cadaver open with a bone saw. Let's stop there and get a few details on this. You can't just drop that in the middle of your conversation."

So, I really didn't think I would ever hear her say anything more extreme than the bone saw incident, but then she blows my mind again.

We were text messaging back and forth for a while, probably a good 45 minutes. Then, there's a five minute silence and I get this text message:

"I took out a f*cking brain this week... it was awesome...and the most disgusting experience of my life."

How do you not start the text messaging with that little tidbit? I wouldn't even say hello to anyone if I had done that. Everyone in my phone would just get a mass text message with extreme details of me taking out a brain.

So I asked for details and this is the response I got:

"I had brain matter all over me. Very messy but probably because out strikers were dull."

Allie is a mad scientist. I am convinced. And I will never cross her ... ever...

Anyway, my friend is awesome and is the only person I can say I know has used a bone saw.

And one last bit of advice, "Did you know you have to cut a V like notch in the skull so you can put the top back on after an autopsy? Otherwise the skull can slide off at an open casket funeral."

Google +

2011-07-02T19:05:00.002-05:00

Everyone wants to have their own Social Media network.

MySpace and Friendster made a bunch of people money years ago.Now Facebook is a multibillion dollar company. I've been on all of these sites at some point or another, usually so I can stalk lady friends.

The downfall of all of these sites are usually correlated with advertising showing up, flash games, spam, etcs. It's a cycle. One that I currently see Facebook going through. In five years, I doubt most of us will be using Facebook still. We'll have all moved on to yet another site. The internet is a fickle beast, with a three year attention span. (Don't believe me, remember Napster, AIM, Limewire, Yahoo! Chat, Yahoo! Games, Yahoo!, Ask Jeeves, Mapquest, Netscape, AOL... yeah, the list keeps going)

So, the new thing everyone is talking about is Google +. Right now, its basically all the cool things about Facebook, without the Farmville games or advertisements.

Google is the greatest internet company around. My blog is hosted by them, my email is hosted by them, I have a calendar through them, I have tons of Google Documents saved to the internet, my phone is Google... really, if Google wanted to ruin my life, they could with a few clicks of a mouse.

I'm still figuring out Google+, but it seems to be pretty easy to integrate everything Google I have. Only time will tell if it'll stick, or go the way of Google Wave.

To the Flea Market!

2011-06-22T23:23:00.003-05:00

Last weekend, Sallie and I grabbed our secret wad of cash (when I say wad, its only a wad because its made of $1 and $5 bills) and we drove to the monthly Belleville flea market.

We didn't have anything in particular we were looking for. I had some comic books and Playstation 1 games on my list and Sallie had a bunch of vintage items for Lacy's bridal shower to look for. We figured we would find some treasures like records or movies as well.

The flea market is set up on the Belleville fair grounds. There are probably a few hundred vendors set up across this large warehouse, few smaller buildings, and parking lot.

The best way I could describe this event is... well, think about Grandpa Dobyn's basement and office spread out on a bunch of folding tables while strangers rifle through and talk about all the cool collectables. Seriously, I know why Grandpa Dobyns loved going to flea markets. He could buy everything he wanted for just about nothing.

The first table we saw had a few dozen rifles, pistols, and this guy...

That's right, that's a freaking mounted machine gun. For the low low price of $800, you can fire 450 X .50mm rounds toward your enemies out of this authentic World War II M2 machine gun.

There were booths with knives, swords, hot wheels, Nazi paraphernalia, red neck clothing, street signs, food, and knock off sports jerseys.

I think the strangest thing was a guy selling medicine. He had two folding tables worth of pharmaceuticals, most of which were probably going bad in the heat if they weren't already expired. Across the way from Dr. Weird was another man exclusively selling women cleansing products.

Sallie ended up finding a great necklace and a vintage punch bowl set and spent less than $20.

We spent a little less than three hours roaming around and I'm ready to go back next month.

The Perfect Run

2011-06-20T18:52:00.003-05:00

I've been diligently trying to work off that vacation gut I talked about a few weeks back, but the humidity and terrifying thunderstorms haven't been helping my motivation. (Sallie and I are both winter runners for sure)

A few days ago though, I had one of my more perfect runs since the half marathon Sallie and I ran last year.

I had spaghetti the night before, three Lion's Choice roast beef sandwiches (this was my only real meal of the day, I'm not fat, just really love roast beef sandwiches) for lunch that day and a banana about an hour before my run. So in those three meals I had the trifecta: carbs for energy, protein for muscle rebuilding, and potassium to kill the cramps. I didn't plan it out that way, just sort of happened.

I spent the last twenty minutes of my work shift stretching, which I don't normally do before a run. I was feeling pretty great, even before I took my first step.

The thing about a perfect run is its not just how well you run that makes it. It's a combination of yourself and the environment around you. The classic character vs environment conflict.

I hit the pavement just as the sun was going over the horizon, but I still had plenty of daylight to see well.

As I rounded the corner, the Bosnian bakery down the street from me was baking cookies and cake. A scent that put me instantly in a great mood. I couldn't help but ignore the humidity. The cookies made me think of Christmas.

I have a pacing problem when I'm alone. I go into a full sprint without paying attention and burn myself out quickly. This was the case at about the mile mark. I had to slow down and walk. Just then a toothless man in a fishing hat sitting in a lawn chair yelled out, "Ah man, that's alright. You gotta walk it out. You're going to pick it back up in a minute here, I can tell." He punctuated his cheering with a laugh I could only describe as Ving Rames playing Santa who had been smoking for 40 years.

I was propelled forward again and started running. I made it to about the 2.5 mile mark and was joined by a five year old who ran next to me for a few houses. I let him beat me to our imaginary finish line and he looked satisfied.

The next mile and a half was rough. I ran along Kingshighway, my Zune constantly battling with traffic noises. It was picking the correct music, but the sounds of horns and sirens often over-powered.

Then as I made it to my street, I could see my house towering above the rest. My 4.5 mile loop was just about complete for the night. I was ready to be in the air conditioning again. I was ready to park my ass on the couch, put my knee in its brace and ice my feet. Right on the home stretch, my Vietnamese neighbor was in his front yard, drinking a tall boy, with a very obvious drunk smile, and he says the only English I think he knows, "It's a good day yes!"

Yes sir, it was a good day.

A Long Sunday

2011-06-12T19:21:00.005-05:00

Usually on the weekends, I split up errand running and yard work. Usually I'll go to the grocery store on Saturday and then spend Sunday out in the yard. Sallie had the car this Saturday morning, so I decided to put it off and just do it all Sunday.

So, we went to Target and the Grocery store this morning. Wasn't the worst trip I've had, people weren't really getting in my way, but still, a tiring trip.

We came home and started prepping some food because I'm working overtime all week and probably won't feel like doing it then.

Then I decided, I have to at least mow the lawn before it rains again tonight.

So I go outside figuring this will be quick. Lawn mowing turns into weeding the garden, putting in the landscaping trim, and replanting some spices. Total time on my feet today: About 8 hours.

So, as I'm tearing up the weeds, I fill my landscaping bag and then bring it to the alley to throw the weeds away when I find this.

That is a picture snapped after I cleaned it up a little. When I originally went outside, this six month old Christmas tree was just on top of the lids of the dumpster and surrounding it on all sides.

What's even more lazy is they just left their Christmas tree lights attached to the tree and just chain sawed it into pieces. Trees in the yard waste dumpsters get turned into mulch that anyone with a St. Louis City address can get for free, which means, someone is going to get ground up light bulbs in their mulch. Not cool.

So I spend15 minutes breaking the branches into smaller bits, shoving the tree into the yard waste bin, and removing the Christmas tree lights when I could find them.

So, now that I'm back inside, I'm f-ing tired. My feet hurt, my hands hurt, my back is sore, and my eyes feel puffy. So now, I'm sitting down, just having one of my newly brewed beers, the Imperial Nut Brown...

...and it's delicious.

The After Vacation Gut

2011-06-08T23:26:00.003-05:00

After two mini-vacations, its time for me to get back to working out.

After eating out most meals, drinking beer to wash down that food, and generally lazying about, I've gained weight. I'm not sure how much, but I don't want to know. I think I'm probably hanging out around 215. My goal weight has been 190-195, which was my high-school weight.

Today, I've cut back on food. I worked out in the morning and am getting ready to work out again tonight.

I also spent all day in an office without air conditioning. That means when its 97 degrees and miserable outside, its about 103 with the computer running in the office. I'll admit, I took a large amount of calls today without a shirt on. Can't wait for winter... I hope it snows so much we have to start using the metric system to make sense of how many meters of snow there are.

So I'm eating less, working out, and sweating all the toxins out all day. That's a pretty good strategy for losing my vacation weight and to be able to wear something besides sweat pants. Yeah, feeling pretty good.

The thing is, I'm STARVING right now. I don't need food. I've still had about 2,000 calories today, but I'm used to having huge rich meals at least twice a day. All I can think about is how much I could eat five Taco Bell tacos right now. Yeah, that's right, five tacos. I would eat the crap out of them. With double hot sauce and probably some sour cream.

Sallie needs to get home ASAP so we can go for a run and I can occupy my mind. Maybe I'll wear myself out enough to fall asleep. I think if I can eat like a normal person for the next few days, I'll be back to normal appetite by the weekend.

Ultramarathon Man

2011-06-02T11:00:00.000-05:00

Whenever I can show some support for Sallie's hobbies, I will typically try to jump on it. It's sort of hard when her hobby is running and fitness. You can't just buy her dumbells for her birthday and you're good for a while.

Don't get me wrong, I liked being in shape and working out, but Sallie drinks this stuff in. She gets special socks, counts calories all day, spends tons of money on equipment, shoes, and gyms. She likes talking about "PRs," blood pressure levels, insane feats of humanity, and every step she learns in ballet class. I don't understand a lot of it, but I try to listen. (I imagine I do the same to her when talking about tech.)

I'm perfectly happy going for a 45 minute run after work or doing some weight lifting. That's really the extent of my life in fitness. I usually feel too busy for leisurely jobs. I'm mowing the lawn or fixing something. And generally, this is how I feel before and after a workout.

So Netflix recommended a documentary about a guy that ran 50 marathons, in 50 states, in 50 days called "Ultramarathon Man.". Sallie would love to see this, I know she's already read about him. I love seeing people overcome extreme situations.

The guy was a badass, don't get me wrong. He ran 50 freakin' marathons in 50 days. But his times weren't spectacular for the most part. I mean, he would've smoked me. His legs were as big as my torso. But he was coming in for the most part in the 3:45-4 hour range.

It was inspiring, made me want to get out there and run. (Sort of how when you watch Rocky, you want to train and box.) I was thinking, if this guy can do 50 full marathons, I would easily do another half marathon.

Then the last race, in New York, the bastard finishes in 3 hours. That's only 15 minutes more than it took me to finish the half marathon. Seriously, he ran 13.1 miles farther than me, and it only took him 15 minutes more. Screw that guy. Him and his super human strength. He needs to join the freakin' X-Men or something.

Anyway, guy raised a bunch of money to fight childhood obesity. He seemed really down to earth. Scientists basically said he only had the muscle damage of 1/4 a normal runner after a marathon after running all 50. So he's totally a freak, but at least he's doing it for a good cause. The film is interesting and well worth a watch.

Here's his website if you want to check him out: http://www.ultramarathonman.com/flash/

The James Bond Shower

2011-05-29T11:00:00.000-05:00

I've recently started taking what is referred to as a "James Bond Shower" to help me wake up in the morning.

Basically, you take your normal hot shower. Get clean. Then, the last part of the shower, you turn the water down. Maybe not to freezing, but enough to chill you a little bit. I typically stand under the water for about a minute or two before I wuss out and towel off.

It's really refreshing. I'm sort of surprised, but sort of not. I've had experience with the icy hell that is the cold shower.

After spending two months in Columbia with no gas (thanks to the former residents who didn't pay their gas bill) and having to take cold showers every day. While it was happening, I hated life. I hated to get clean. I never felt like the soap was rinsed off of me. But one thing I did notice was that I was alert and ready to go. I vowed to never take a cold shower again.

And here I am, the punctuation of every one of my showers now is a cold one.

It turns out there are several health benefits from this hot and cold shower: better circulation, relieves depression, strengthens immunity, and makes your skin and hair healthier.

Click here for the article on all the health benefits of the James Bond shower.

The reason the person on the site referred to it as a James Bond shower is that James Bond would finish all of his showers like this in the books. It adds a little flair to hygiene. Makes me feel a little more manly, a little more secret agent and British.

I have to admit. I've been drinking a lot less coffee lately.I used to need coffee just to get out of bed, but now I usually only make a pot if Sallie needs some.

I've also been motivated to work out more. I normally work out about 3-4 times a week, but recently its been closer to 5-6. Definitely feel more active and want to get out more often.

This cold water shower is really benefiting me.

Now the downside to this is the four months in the winter when its too freakin' cold for me to even think about having cold water on my body. Hell, I would wear a hoody in the shower if I could in January. I think I'll probably go to my old ways of drinking 10 cups of coffee a day to keep me warm and moving.

Good news is, there's also health benefits to drinking coffee. Goodbye diabetes and Colon cancer! To between the summer and winter regiments, I should be one health American boy.

Rapture and the Macho Man

2011-05-25T13:14:00.000-05:00

So, guess what, Rapture didn't happen.

Who would've thunk it?

Even though the one guy that was saying rapture was going to happen was mostly though as a crazy man, there's always that bit of fear in the back of your mind that, maybe just maybe he could be right.

Unfortunately, if he was right, and rapture would start at 6pm on May 21st, I would've been experiencing it on an airplane.

He really shouldn't have predicted it happening down to the minute. The current calendar configuration we use, the Gregorian calendar, was only put into use in 1582. The bible wouldn't refer to an exact date. Jesus or God would literally have to come to us and say, "On your calendar, one this exact day, rapture will begin" to actually be able to predict it. I just don't feel like that's God's style.

The only victim of rapture was Macho Man Randy Savage. He was a great wrestler and entertainer, a huge part of my childhood. I remember being brought to a wrestling event when I was maybe four or five with my uncle Eric at the old arena. The entire event held my jaw wide open, but it wasn't until the main event that I was for the next 10 years, a full on supporter of wrestling.

The Iron Sheik and Sargent Slaughter came out cursing America, flipping off the fans who were booing them. Then things got quiet, the lights went out. And we got an entrance from the Macho Man like this.

Him and Hulk Hogan were fighting for the fans in St. Louis and all of America really. He was one hell of an entertainer.

May you drop the flying elbow on heaven Macho Man Randy Savage.

Why I hate summer

2011-05-24T00:00:00.002-05:00

Most people know I hate summer, especially summer in Missouri.

There's the obvious things like the humidity and heat. I hate mowing the lawn. The sun burn on my scalp. But the thing that gets me the most are the invisible creepy crawly feelings.

I was out running tonight and I had a constant feeling of mosquitoes landing on me and biting. I was slapping my skin, itching the surface, basically looking like a crazy person freaking out in public.

I got home and took note of the damage. None. I didn't see a single bit. I've been so conditioned over 26 years to spazz out at the mere feel of a mosquito that I have phantom bites. I don't know if its the mosture or sweat, but something sends the same nerve receptors off.

The other invisible bastard is spider webs. These are a little harder to deal with. Once you hit one, you feel them all over your body. Every step you take feels like another web stuck to you with scary spiders slowly crawling their way up your arms wanting to lay eggs inside your ears. F that!

When there's six inches of snow on the ground and the wind chill brings the world down to ten degrees, I can be damn sure that there aren't any spiders or mosquitoes out. Life is good cause I know they are all dead below the ground.

The Fun Parts of Arizona

2011-05-23T17:00:00.001-05:00

It's weird being in an entirely different eco-system than you're used to. Arizona is exactly how you see it in those old wild west movies. Sprawling mountain ranges, towering flat topped mesas, cactus everywhere, and a brutal sun that can quickly be exchanged for rolling storm clouds.

Sedona is an area where all the hippies like to go. There are energy vortexes and crystals and positive energies and possibly random jam sessions.

Even if you aren't there to seek out vortexes and crystals, there's positive energy and beauty as far as the eye can see.

You get scenes like this in a 360 degree view.

The place we were staying was exceptional. The beds were large, each room had full on cable and a jacuzzi, and there was a babbling creek right behind it filled with mountain run off water. It was beyond peaceful.

The town was your typical tourist town with rows of stores selling air brushed shirts, rocks, and random postcards that had nothing to do with Sedona, yet had the city name stamped on them.

I was excited to try some new beers from the region. Sierra Nevada has many many more flavors than we get in St. Louis. There were a lot of gluten free, vegetarian, hippie crap too that was also good.

The best part about beer though is at the elevation we were at (around 4,000 feet) each beer is as powerful as 1.5-2 beers. Nick, Sallie, and I sat around the hotel room and after a beer were all feeling pretty good.

My father's ceremony was also nice. Done by a hippie, at the foot of a mountain called Cathedral rock, next to a flowing creek, with the sun hitting the perfect lighting during the short but fulfilling ceremony. The hippie that officiated had the most relaxing voice I've ever heard. I would pay her to just come to my room at night before I go to bed and just talk. Seriously, her voice was like a massage and a back re-alignment rolled into one. It was great.

Everything about Sedona was a light state of Nirvana. The wedding ceremony, food, drinks, weather, everything was just perfect.

I wish we could've had another day there, but like all good vacations it had to come to an end. Hopefully we'll be able to make another trip, Brett included, on a long weekend later this year.

The Burden of Travel

2011-05-22T12:01:00.002-05:00

"That's it!" I said. "I'm not flying American Airlines ever again. Well, unless there's no other option."

I hate traveling. I love the destination. I know that sounds like an obvious statement, but I do know people that find this sort of inner peace when traveling.

Our flight leaving St. Louis was at 6 am, which meant we had to leave our house at 4 AM.. So the night before, I took a pill to help me sleep, and passed out at 11. Sallie had to work and didn't get home until after midnight. So, I got the most sleep at around 4 hours. Sallie the least at 2.

Surprisingly we were all feeling pretty good. We parked in lot D, well before the sun was coming up, packed onto a trolly, and were dropped off at the airport.

Things went smoothly. We went through security in about 10 minutes, made it to the plane right as it was boarding and we were off to Dallas.

Thus far, American Airlines had only irritated me with how they handled Brett's cancellation. They wouldn't give a full credit for a ticket, only about half of one. It would be one thing if the plane was empty and Brett's ticket mattered, but it was filled to the brim.

My second irritation came shortly after because we hadn't really had anything to eat. Our stomachs started waking up shortly after take off. I've flown Frontier, United, and Southwest... all offered pretzels or peanuts or something. American did not. We did get a drink, but I needed some real calories.

Dallas... ahhh Dallas. I always complain about the humidity in St. Louis, but Dallas is truly the armpit of America. The 100 feet we had to walk through to get into the airport caused my body to almost shut down from sweating so hard.

The airport is set up like a figure 8 almost, with an indie 8 and outside 8. You can't get to any other terminal without jumping on a little tram they have that rides along the entire outside of the airport. Things weren't labeled the greatest, but we found our way. The hour we had for a layover meant nothing, by the time we made it to the terminal for our connecting flight, it was boarding and getting ready to take off.

This was a larger airplane, so I hoped against hope that maybe they would have some food. They did not. In fact, I realized that I am too tall for American Airlines because I couldn't pull the tray table down thanks to my long legs. And when the large man reclined in front of me, I could barely breath.

The trip to Sedona was pretty easy. It was the trip back that was rough. It had become significantly warmer, Sallie wasn't feeling well, and we had a good 32,000 round-abouts to take before we left Sedona. After spending a little over two hours in the car, we sat at my dad's waiting to go to the airport. We arrived, got through pretty quickly and started the wait.

It was apparent something was wrong. Our boarding time came and went. We saw American Airline folks getting nervous. Our airplane started getting pulled away from the gate. Before they made the announcement, Sallie jumped in line, knowing that something was going down.

They announced that the flight was going to be delayed an hour and a half, which meant we were going to miss our connecting flight to St. Louis. They handed us a 1-800 number and told us to call them to get taken care of. We called the 800 number and they had no idea what was going on. Apparently, the people at the front counter only listed the plane as delayed and the 800 number can't do anything with that. So we went back to the counter and eventually got our flights changed. They put us on a flight the next day. We would have to spend the night in Dallas.

They couldn't tell us anything that was going to happen until we flew into Dallas. We showed up and found out we had been booked into a Marriot down the street and gave us a meal voucher for breakfast.

The Marriot was nice enough, but the room we were in was a $500 a night room and there was nothing special about it. There was one king sized bed and a chair. There was one television and they didn't even have HBO, just HBO family. Why would anyone stay in a hotel like that?

So the only restaurant open was the hotels and we spend $50 for "ok" at best food. We then pass out for 5 hours, get on another plane, and come back to St. Louis.

We thought the travel misery was finally over, but then realized we had to play for another day of parking and on the way back from the airport, got stuck in construction on 170.

So now, after eating several days of fast food and not showering as well as I would want, I'm at home, popping vitamins, looking for fruit, swearing to not get into a plane again for a few months.

Next up... the fun parts of the trip...

Naan

2011-05-09T17:16:00.003-05:00

I'm not the biggest fan of Indian food, but the one thing I love there is the Indian flat bread known as Naan.

Typically, Indian buffets will have 3-8 different sauces (usually various Chutneys) for you to dip your naan in. It's delicious. For real.

Every now and then I get this intense craving for Naan, but its not worth me paying $14 for an Indian buffet when all I'm going to eat is some flat bread and sauce.

A few days ago I was carving naan pretty badly and decided, "Dan, you are a baker now. You've made multiple types of bread. Let's find a recipe, and make this happen." So I did.

Naan is much easier and takes a lot less time than other breads I've made. Typically, fermentation of naan only takes about one hour and twenty five minutes, whereas other breads, like Ciabatta, ferment for days before you actually bake.

However, with artisan breads, you typically want to be very gentle. Even when mixing the dough, you want to be careful not to deflate the dough or work it too hard. It's all about providing a gentle wave of creation over the dough.

With naan... that doesn't work. You have to make naan your bitch by punching and rolling and flipping it until its a thin, flat, piece of dough. Then you basically throw it on a 400 degree grill and burn it into submission.

It was a very different experience than I'm used to. I was constantly second guessing myself and wondering if I was doing things right. Then end result was awesome. I'm probably going to start making it regularly because it makes such a good snack and staple of just about any recipe.

I'm going to refine the recipe a bit and then I'll put it in that cook book I've been promising all of you for years.

Happy Free Comic Book Day 2011

2011-05-07T19:59:00.003-05:00

That's right folks! It's the first Saturday in May, which means FREE COMIC BOOK DAY!

I haven't been to a free comic book day in a few years, so this morning, I woke up early, and drove down to the local comic depository.

It was a great atmosphere. A dozen or so nerds bee-lining to the free comic table to choose which books they wanted before they disappeared. Then, the genius hidden ploy of free comics day, they all felt like they had to spend at least a little money at the store. Their attention turned to the dollar bins, where they tore through a decade of un-bought discount comics.

Every time a new person came through the door, the owner of the store would wish them a happy free comic day, and the other customers would mutter a cheer in their direction.

I wandered in and immediately picked up the last copy of the free Spiderman comic (probably the most popular of comics today) and a Captain America\Thor comic.

I started perusing the racks for other little gems like all the other fan boys. It was hard to get into the areas I wanted. The Punisher section had a line (probably because it was close to the Star Wars and Star Trek comics) and the Captain America and Nick Fury comics had already been picked over.

That's when I saw him. The sort of guy I wanted to see. He was about 5'10", 230 lbs, of glorious, cape wearing, nerd-dom. That's right, homeboy had a cape on.

He ran to the table and looked over the selection, frustrated. Then, I saw his eyes immediately start going to everyone's hands. I knew already what he wanted. He was looking for the Spiderman comic. His eyes hit the copy dangling from my hands and then followed my arm up to my face. He approached me.

Now I learned long ago, that if a man in a cape approaches you, you try to make him as happy as possible.

"Hey, how you doing?" He says to me, sweat forming on his forehead.

"Pretty good, how you doing?" I reply, knowing what his intentions are, not wanting to easily give this guy anything without him asking.

"Hey man, can I ask you a favor? I've been to four comic book shops already looking for that Spiderman comic. Every place has been out. Is there anyway you could give that copy up? Please?"

I guess it was partly the desperation in his eye and partly just going with the spirit of the day, I handed him the comic, and made him possibly the happiest caped person of the day. I went to the table and grabbed what would've been my third choice, a Star Wars comic.

On my way through the checkout, I was also handed one of the last Green Lantern figures, and I came home like a 13 year old. Giddy and excited, I soon caught a nice high off of the smell of newsprint that carried me through the rest of the day.

Just Saying

2011-05-03T16:04:00.002-05:00

I just wanted to say, doesn't today just feel like a great day to be alive?

Work has been terrible for several weeks now and its been non-stop cloudy and rainy.

Today, I've got the windows open and can hear the animals outside. The cats are happy. The weather is perfect. It just feels like a great day and I wanted to share that.

Just really makes you want to listen to a little E.L.O.

The Musician without Rhythm

2011-04-29T19:17:00.002-05:00

I always wanted to be a singer in a rock band. I never planned on playing guitar at all. There's reason for this, I have no natural rhythm whatsoever.

With singing, you can feel the music, take your cues from the drums and bass. There's a rhythm built for you. It was a hump I never really got over. I wrote some great lyrics. I'd stumbled through some interesting enough guitar parts, but I just couldn't put them together.

I started playing guitar as a way to have accompaniment (it's weird to see someone just singing by them self) and to have something to do during the parts of the song where there isn't any singing.

Like the thousands of other people in high school, I played guitar decent enough. There were always talks of starting a band and inevitably the bands would fall apart sometime after the first practice.

By the time I got to college I would say I was proficient. The problem being, I had no time to play guitar and there were thousands of other guitarists more proficient than me. I almost didn't play a single chord the last year of college until recently.

Work has been tough lately and one day at my bursting point I picked up my guitar and just started hitting chords as hard as I could. By the end of the day, my fingers burned. Calluses that had become soft were raised from my skin and the stress seemed to be gone from my body.

Over the past month I've been playing something like five hours of guitar a week. As much as I would still love to be a rock star, I still just don't have that natural rhythm. I have enough to get me by, and my voice is decent enough, but I doubt I'll ever play in front of a 3,000 person crowd. The few college classes that I played in front of will probably be the largest crowd I ever stand in front of, but I got a hell of a lot farther than most those guitar players at my high school.

Canoe Away for True Happiness

2011-04-21T20:02:00.002-05:00

The past two weeks of work have been one of those disgustingly busy times where you go into auto-pilot mode. You're knocking things out as they come and doing a great job. You never really feel rested. You have trouble sleeping from your caffeine induced alertness. You know that you can get through it, as long as no curve balls come your way.

Today, I got smacked in the face with a fast curve ball as I logged into my email.

A fix for an issue we've seen over the past few weeks had been passed around between various help desks. It was one of those unwritten fixes everyone knew. I documented this fix to make sure no one messed it up, and hell fire rained down from there. I don't want to go into the details because I don't like to talk specifics of work, but I spent the rest of the day trying to recover and prove my innocence.

It's a three day weekend for most of the employees because the market is closed for Good Friday, which means highly stressed brokers trying to get last minute things finished before all the support groups leave. Which means they are short-tempered and willing to tear anyone that will listen down. It seemed like everyone was in this mood.

After a day like today, I lean back in my chair and close my eyes and try to think of my happy place.

For some reason the first thing that pops into my mind is me, by myself in a canoe, in the middle of a lake. I'm not sure if I've actually ever been to this lake. It seems familiar but I can't quite place it.

I'm surrounded by the tallest trees, all of them draped with Spanish Moss. The air is thick in pollen and flowers, but my allergies are just fine.

I lay back in the canoe, reach behind me into a cooler, and grab one of the coldest beers imaginable. My legs hang over either side of the canoe and my feet dangle into the refreshing water. The sun shines on my body and the only shadow cast is that caused by the smile on my face.

Then the phone rings and I'm back at work, the computer monitors are my prison walls and the wireless headset is just a pseudo freedom. I'm still very much chained to my desk.

Speaking of Spanish Moss, there's an Against Me! song called "Spanish Moss" that is exactly about getting away.

Fallout Shelter

2011-04-19T15:37:00.004-05:00

When I moved to the city, there was a Cold War remnant I had never seen before.

Large government and public buildings had radioactive signs hung outside the door indicating that that building was a fallout shelter. This is the one on the school down the street from me.

I walk a lot in my area and I really started to notice more and more how many of these buildings exist. I start to think about the era. I've never really had to worry about nuclear bombs falling. I only saw U.S.S.R. printed on globes until 2nd grade. I've never worried about a country, so similar to my own, that we knew we had to be protected from them.

I also think about how likely it is that you would be able to make it to a shelter in time to survive a nuclear bombing. To me, it almost seemed like a false sense of security. Yes, I guess if you weren't at the epicenter of where the bomb was dropped, you have a little bit of time to get to a shelter before radioactive fallout started raining from the sky.

But that's a big if.

I know the threat was real, but I think there was a false sense of security. In the back of the minds of people in charge and in the military, they sort of knew that because we had nuclear missiles, Russia wasn't going to launch. It was basically going to be a standoff or total world destruction, and no matter what the propaganda said on either side, neither country was that evil.

Bring Out the Zamboni

2011-04-09T14:28:00.004-05:00

And then the lights went low at Scott Trade. The fans filed out to their cars wiping excited tears from their eyes. The season was over, but they hungered for next season. The building is now empty of the echoes of screaming fans.

Sure there will be Bon Jovi and Josh Groben over the summer, but 24,000 people wearing their blue and yellow proudly feed the building an energy it hungers for in the off season. It's an energy that the biggest band in the world couldn't match.

The fans stayed through all of the struggles in January, and we rejoiced together during the high times.

It was a fight being down Perron, Oshie, Jackman, McDonald, and Steen for large portions of the season, but the Blues managed to keep a respectable level of play even with a roster of seemingly all minor league players.

There was the heartbreak of having Marek Svatos and Kyle Wellwood snatched on waivers when the Blues really could've used their talent.

It was a surprise to see Eric Johnson, the hailed future superstar of the Blues, traded to Colorado with Jay McClement for Chris Stewart and Kevin Shattenkirk. We traded Boyes, Brewer, and Winchester. We're likely to lose Conklin over the off-season. The team doesn't look nearly the same as it did back in September.

David Backes has hit a career high in points, tied his career high in goals, and has become a leader that will most likely be wearing a "C" on his jersey next year.

Chris Stewart picked up his goal scoring production the moment he put on a Blues jersey, and if he can keep up this pace, will be a potential 45 goal scorer next year.

Next year will be a differnt team. Every though we've said it several years in a row, I truly believe we finally have the makings of a playoff ready team. So for this year, yes, the Blues join 13 other teams, in not making the playoffs. But Lord Stanley's Cup will be there next year, danging like a carrot in front of a hungry horses mouth.

So bring out the Zamboni, I'll see you in 2011-2012 St. Louis Blues.

Learning to be a Man

2011-04-08T18:56:00.003-05:00

There's a definition of what a man is that was born out of the early 1900s which was in turn a screw on the definition of what a man was before.

He's the provider. Fixed things around the house. He hunts. He fights. He's a big flesh sack of testosterone.

Well, technology has sort of wussified that definition of a man. Nowadays a man doesn't need to hunt his food. Many guys just get a good job and buy their food. They can pay people to change their oil. Instead of trying to take the pipes under the sink apart and figure out the clog themselves, they call a plumber first.This is the sensitive, suburban, male.

I started out as one of these guys, but I feel I'm slowly morphing into more of the old style male.

I was never into sports. I liked going to Cardinal games as a kid. I always had a special love for the Blues. I've never been able to hang with the stat slinging, beer drinking, backwards hat wearing sports nut... until now. Hockey is my sport and the Blues are my love affair.

I've had incredibly bad luck with cars. This is part of the reason that I drive a scooter and haven't tried to get a car. Mine will always break at the worst time. It's always when I send in that last payment on the car and POW! transmission falls out the bottom.

Well, I've had such bad luck with cars that I've learned how to do a lot of things on my own. My dad did some good basic prep work, but fixing a car is one of those things that you can't learn, until something goes wrong. I've learned how to change a tire, clean the air filter, install a new battery, headlight, fuse, change the oil, and fill all of the fluids. Now, this is all mostly easy maintenance, but if I asked five of my peers how to do any of this, four of them would stare at me blankly.

Owning a house has also taught me a great deal, such as, when you own a house, you don't have any free time.

I remember my parents always doing cleaning or yard work on the weekends, but it always seemed like they would at least get a little free time. Maybe Sunday, there were no plans. I never felt like they were constantly catching up on issues and chores like I am. I probably was busy living in my own world to really notice, but now that I'm in the thick of things, I understand where the phrase, "There just aren't enough hours in a day" comes from.

I'm constantly cleaning, fixing, or installing something. I'm glad I work from home now because I spend most of my lunch breaks doing chores. I do have a little more free time now, but man, it still doesn't seem like enough.

I guess the point of this little ramble is, I am learning to be a "man" as best I can. There was a running joke in Calvin and Hobbes that there was a manual on how to be a father. This magical manual gave you all the information you'll ever need to know. Well, I'm not good at learning from a book. I have to be shown how to do things. But I've been able to get the ladder out and attack most problems with a screw-driver and hammer in hand.

There are a few "man" things I still need to learn. If anyone knows how or can hook up the activity, let me know cause I need all the help I can get.

Man things:

-Shoot a gun

-Fix back kitchen window. (Don't have a tall enough ladder and just haven't been able to get it to work.)

-Clean a carburetor on a Honda scooter

-Get my lawn to grow thick and even

-Build a fence and 2 gates

-Get into a bar fight defending someone's honor

-Find the most incredibly illegal and dangerous firework ever, keep a lighter in my possession, drink 4-6 beers, and see what happens.

-Go camping in a situation where a crossbow is necessary

-Rescue orphans from a burning building

-Wear a cowboy hat as an accessory to a formal event

Basically I need to be a combo of Burt Reynolds and John Wayne.

Proposition E Passes

2011-04-06T12:47:00.003-05:00

So the one ballot initiative that I cared about yesterday did pass and I made the mistake of going to the Post Dispatch's website to look at the comments.

I do this from time to time because I want to see reasons why certain people vote one way or another, and by the time I was done reading the comments I wanted to throw a brick through a window.

First: What is Prop E?

Prop E is the 5 year extension of a 1% tax on any residents and commuters that work within the city of St. Louis or Kansas City. This money is used for police, firefighters, parks departments, and road crews.

Its a very important tax for anyone that uses either downtown.

But the comments were astounding.

Most the complaints were people that lived in Clayton, St. Charles, Ofallon saying that they shouldn't have to pay for those utilities for the city, when they already pay for them in their area.

Why should I, who lives in Clayton, have to pay a city tax because my job happens to be downtown?

OK, that's a fair point. But let's look at it this way.

Who makes up most of the crowd at Cardinal, Rams, and Blues games? Suburbanites and out of towners.

Who makes up most of the crowds at the Zoo, History Museum, Art Museum, City Museum, Fox Theater, St. Louis Symphony Orchestra? Suburbanites and out of towners.

What is the first thing you do with people coming in from out of town? Bring them downtown, show them the arch, Forest Park, and maybe take them to a ball game.

Maybe you go out of your way to eat at Crown Candy, Schlafly, or visit the brewery. All of those places are within the city limits.

St. Louis and Kansas City are relatively cheap compared to other cities. If Proposition E was shot down, there would be other ways to raise the money. Sales tax would increase, toll booths could be set up, sin taxes could be initiated... this is what other cities have done to make this money.

At least with Proposition E, the people paying the tax are the ones that use the downtown areas most often, those that live there and those that work there.

Vote of Die!

2011-04-05T11:31:00.004-05:00

Ahhh, election day in St. Louis. The sun is shinning. The birds are chirping. The temperature is a crisp 38 degrees.

Yes, I woke up to be one of the proud 10% of registered voters to turn out today.

This is actually my first election in St. Louis. Through some processing error, they were unable to get my registered to vote for the Barack Obama election, but somehow requested my presence for jury duty only two weeks later.

This actually has bearing on most of St. Louis. This vote today determines if that 1% commuter and resident tax for the city stays in place. I bet if people paid attention to that, we would have a turnout closer to 35%.

I guess voting was made easier since my polling place was at the school on the corner of my street. I woke up, ate a donut, and walked up to vote.

Anyway, it was a quick vote. Four things were on the ballet, 2 of which were uncontested, and the 3rd might as well have been. (Democrat vs a Green party member. Wish they had a chance, but I just don't think so.) And the 1% tax issue.

I tried to look up information about the candidates, but I couldn't find anything. Really the only literature I found was a bill-board for an alderman not in my area. But Gus, I would've voted for you if I had the option. Everyone else, I found nothing. Not even a Facebook or Linked in profile. No government pages. And I didn't see election covered on the Post Dispatches website until this morning.

I wandered into the gym to find eight volunteers, several of whom were munching on huge bags of spicy chips. Did the electronic voting, which was hella easy. And was out of there within five minutes. I had set aside 15-20 minutes for the whole thing, but had only spent seven minutes walking there and voting.

So I walked the long way home, enjoying the beautiful crisp jacket weather one last time before the humidity rolls in and makes the next four months an un-enjoyable, baseball filled, allergy ridden, hell.

Oh, the Things we Keep

2011-03-31T13:09:00.002-05:00

One thing I've learned since getting married is all that crap your parent have been keeping for memories and for "the grandkids", end up in your basement somehow.

We had to buy 5 shelves so all the stuff we've picked up over the past three years has a place to live and collect dust.

For instance: Sallie and I had a humble milk crate worth of Christmas decorations our first Christmas together, now we have four giant plastic tubs, a milk-crate, and a tree stand that doesn't really fit anywhere.

Sallie's Barbies are currently living in two giant plastic crates.

And then I take up the most space. I currently have a half refrigerator box filled with Star Wars toys, another smaller box with the overflow of Star Wars toys, two giant plastic boxes of Legos, and three giant plastic bins with memories and such.

So why do we keep this stuff?

I can tell you I don't spend all day down in my basement looking at it. I can't remember the last time I thought, I should really display my perfect attendance certificate from third grade. And why do I have a sandbag from the great flood of 1993 still?

Well, last night I was downstairs trying to clean some of this stuff up because it started over-flowing, and honestly I wasn't sure what we had. (My mom has managed to slip a lot of Nick and Brett's toys in with my stuff. Does she not know who's is who's or is she an evil genius? I'll let you decide.)

I managed to get rid of about three trash bags worth of stuff that I honestly didn't know what it was, stuff that was ridiculous that it was still being kept, or had been ruined by the ravages of time.

But I also realized why a lot of this stuff was kept. There are warm memories attached to everything in those bins. I'm keeping it in case I have an extremely awful day and need to remember the good times.

For instance, there are about 32 awards from my grade school days. Not only is there proof that at one point I was considered a genius, but I also had five Physical Education and Sportsman like behavior awards. I've got multiple perfect attendance awards. So contrary to the person my wife knows, there's proof that at one point I was intelligent and great at sports, and apparently I've always had a great constitution, keeping me healthy and out of the nurses office.

There's also just about every note I've ever been given by a girlfriend in one binder. You can literally follow my blossoming relationships all the way to their demise multiple times right up until my marriage. (This is going to make a great movie later when I'm famous.)

I've got so many drawings and songs and writings from my childhood. Some of which are great, some epic, but some are epically great like the giant poster board where on one side in giant letters it says "Star Wars: The Greatest Trilogy of all Time" and has a drawing of two dozen characters at the bottom. Then on the backside of the poster board is a comic called, "Mars Explorers" where these scientists on Mars are attacked and for some reason had rocket launchers with them. Makes sense in my mind.

I guess there are multiple reasons I hang on to a lot of this stuff.

1) I can draw inspiration for stories that I write. I tend to write stories that are loosely based off of life, so the more details I have of that life, the better the story. I don't have to go to my memory bank often, but when I do, I get inspired.

2) If I do ever become famous, there will be biographers willing to pay large sums of money to spend an afternoon going through these boxes.

3) If I make it to an old age (which I plan on living past 100) and I start losing my memories, I want to be able to go back to these and annoy my grand nephews and nieces with stories that "back in the 1990s, everyone drank coffee and wore flannel."

I always found the scenes in movies where people are looking at slides or old 9mm camcorder film to be this romantic concept. The imperfections or distortions of the scenes made the world seem like this happy and perfect place. I don't think we get that anymore. In the world of high-definition, we see every zit and gray hair the world has to offer.

... sort of weird that I'm romantically nostalgic for a time I wasn't even alive during.

Overcoming the Things that Baffle

2011-03-23T22:20:00.000-05:00

This year I've really jumped into food related hobbies I know nothing about.

I would always love to go back into the food business once Sallie and I are a bit more financially stable. I guess the dream is that of most people, I want to open my own place, be my own boss, and become a household name.

I have certain strengths already. Sauces, I gotcha covered. Pasta, yeah I can do that too. Meat, I'm pretty good at throwing something together.

First thing that has always baffled me is baking, more specifically bread baking. Bread can literally be the corner-stone of any meal. Can't make a proper sandwich without bread. Best way to mop up leftover pasta sauce is bread. Hell, some people eat bread as a meal.

I didn't know much about bread making, but a guy at my work is a second generation baker. I started talking to him around the end of November and the passion he talked about different bread making techniques piqued my interest. He suggested The Bread Baker's Apprentice as a good starting point. It not only comes with 40 recipes, but explains the history of bread making, why bakers are passionate, and techniques for creating various flavors and shapes.

I tore through the first 70 pages of the history and techniques within a few days. I was eager to dig into my first real bread.

The first thing I made was pizza dough. It's a two day process to properly ferment. It seemed almost too easy. I only had to create the dough and let nature do its stuff for 2 days, until pizza time. I created my own sauce and used Imo's cheese. Although I didn't quite master the pizza dough spin, I did manage to make some of the best pizza I've ever had.

The second bread was a little more complicated, but I could already tell that my skills had improved 10 fold. I made 2 loaves of ciabatta bread. As I bit into the moist, warm bread, I thought to myself, now I understand. I'm ready to dig into much more difficult breads now.

The second thing I've always had a hard time grasping is beer making.

I've drank dozens of flavors and types of beer thanks to the ridiculously cheap prices in Columbia.. I've become somewhat of a connoisseur. But I don't understand how the same basic ingredients can produce wildly different flavors.

A few weekends ago, we went to beer school at the Anheuser-Busch brewery. This was what I really needed. Reading about brewing wasn't teaching me much. I've always been much more about the hands on experience.

I wanted some friends of mine that have been home brewing to help, but our schedules just never worked out. So I decided to jump in, and I love it.

Cory ran around taking pictures of me boiling the hops, mixing in the malt, and watching it ferment for two weeks. (Ok, that's not exactly the most interesting part of the process.)

I just bottled up the beer tonight and over the next three weeks I find out if I made exploding beer time bombs. Yes, if I didn't wait for fermentation to finish, the bottles can fill with so much CO2 that they explode. Either way, I either have beer or a great story.

Third, Sallie and I got our garden going again and this year its bigger. Assuming that neither of us need surgery again this year and we keep up with it, most of our produce and some of our fruit will grow on its own.

I never really knew much about growing, but last year we had some solid results by just throwing seeds in the ground. This year, we've read up a little on this.

We planted lettuce, tomatos, bell peppers, cantalope, watermelon, and cucumbers.

All these DYI hobbies have been great for meditative purposes. It's been a pretty rough beginning of the year and sometimes you just need to go outside and dig in the dirt for a few hours to remember how silly money problems or issues at work really are.

A Rant About Current Technology Trends ... if you will

2011-03-14T15:51:00.004-05:00

Anyone not interested in the newest gadgets or technology can go ahead and ignore this one. This is going to be a rant.

So there are substantial rumors that Microsoft will not make a new Zune mp3 player. They will continue to manufacture the current Zune HDs for the time being and the software will still be supported, but they will not release a Zune HD2. (There are even rumors that Microsoft has been in talks with third parties to license the OS and software.)

For those of you that don't know, I hate iPods and iPhones. It's multi-tiered hate. (You can skip the italicized section if you already know why I don't like them.)

1) When I did have an iPod, the scroll wheel would not work when it was less than 35 degrees out, making it impossible to navigate music.

2) They are waaaaaaaayyyy too expensive and a new one will get released within a year making yours obsolete.

3) iTunes is some of the worst software for managing music out there. Even a buddy of mine who runs iTunes on a Mac says its buggy and crashes like crazy. For instance, I could never update iTunes on my Sony laptop running XP. I would have to uninstall iTunes and then reinstall the new version. This was a multi-hour process because iTunes always had trouble reading music tags and I would have to fix it.

4) The songs on iTunes were (they've gotten a little better) more expensive than on Amazon, Zune, or even Dell marketplace and had DRM that wouldn't allow the songs to play on any non-iPod MP3 player.

5) When my hard drive crashed, I lost about 40 songs I bought on iTunes. When I asked for support getting them back, Apple support said, sorry, you'll have to re-purchase those songs.

6) Steve Jobs just rubs me the wrong way.

The Zune was the best MP3 player I've ever owned. I've had a Walkman, Jukebox, and iPod, and the Zune was towers above all the rest. So I am sad to see it go.

Now saying that, these rumors that the Zune is no more, are all qualified with, "Its because Microsoft is going to run with the Windows 7 phone and put all of the Zune guys working on that." Basically we're getting a Zune phone, that is no longer called a Zune.

This probably means that I will have to pay more for a Windows 7 phone, that won't be activated, just to have the Zune functionality.

I don't like the current trend of technology and the multifunction device. This is very much like the reason I don't like the popular game series, Grand Theft Auto. Yes, it can do everything, but it does everything mediocre.

I don't want a tablet or phone that is also my MP3 player, internet browser, and gaming machine. I want dedicated devices for each, that do the function better.

1) Gaming on a touch screen phone or tablet irritates me. Yes, there are some very innovative games out there, and yes some of those games look great on an iPhone. But the truth of the matter is, touch controls aren't as responsive as having an actual controller in hand and having your fingers touching the screen really just puts your fingers in the way of the game.

I've never played a game on my Droid for longer than a few weeks. After a while, tower defense, physics based games, and point and click adventures get old. I would much rather be sitting on my couch and playing the game on a large screen.

2) The multifunction device is a great way to carry less on long trips. This is true. It's nice always having a way to send email or to check news stories while waiting somewhere. But typing a longer email, or navigating multiple pages just doesn't work near as well as having a real keyboard in front of you.

On top of that, videos are becoming more popular on websites. If the video will play on your mobile device, its going to eat your battery like crazy.

Not only are videos problematic sometimes, but some websites won't even load on a phone or will have a pop-up add block everything.

So until there's a standard or phones become more powerful, there's no way this can take over as your main browser. Give me a laptop any day. Or really, the netbook is the happy medium here.

3)Battery life is the main obstacle here. I used to have a phone that would get 16-18 hours on a charge. Now that my phone can connect to Twitter, Facebook, Gmail, has fancy animations, and can play music, I'm lucky to get to 10 on some days. That's not even including the drain on the phone trying to find a 3G signal, GPS satellite, wifi-connection, etc, if I choose to use it. If battery life can improve significantly, maybe I'll listen to an argument.

The iPhone does MP3 well, but a lot of people I've talked to have said that their calls aren't exactly clear (Remember antennae gate?) and the network can be sluggish pretty often. The battery life isn't so bad, but let's remember, the primary function is the phone.

My Droid browses really well, has insanely good clarity on my calls, but the music playing software is a joke and it would be nice to have a standard platform like iTunes to manage all of my applications and games.

Basically what I'm saying is, I'd rather have a dedicated device for each function, and I would like that device to do it well. If someone put out a truly exceptional device that could be both a phone, MP3 player, and browser with a good battery, I'd think about changing my stance, but as it stands now, I'd rather have separate devices.

True/False Festival 2011

2011-03-06T18:22:00.004-06:00

I've been attending the True/False Film Festival in Columbia in some form four out of the last five years. The festival fills the streets of Columbia, creates this insanely dedicated community of enthusiasts, and inflates local business' profit for the weekend.

It's a weird festival. Constantly on the cusp of becoming a premier film festival, but remaining just small enough to keep the Yuppies and Hollywood types from descending on the college town and ruining everything. Its weird walking the streets and wandering by a table at a cafe where 3-4 of the directors are hanging out, eating sandwiches, and drinking beers.

It's also a huge advantage to know the town. Whereas most of the tourists wandered into places like Shakespears and Harpos, Sallie and I were able to avoid the large crowds and have intimate and entertaining dinners and drinks off the beaten path.

Unfortunately, the growth of the festival seems to have gotten to the point where they're going to need to add a few venues and possibly another day.

This year, Sallie and I bought the step up on our passes. Unlike last year where we got to see any movie Friday-Sunday, this year we could see movies Thursday-Sunday and get into all of the events.

We're supposed to be able to choose tickets before most of the film goers, but as I was on the website clicking the movies we wanted to see, our prime choices started dissapearing quickly. I had to make some quick decisions and hit the submit button without thinking much about it. We didn't get into two of the movies we really wanted to see and had nothing to watch all Friday morning.

Last year, with these passes, we were able to line up outside the theater and if people that had tickets didn't show up to the film, they would let us in.

This year, so many people didn't get tickets to the films that the lines for the queue were double and sometimes triple the length of who would get in.

So Friday we bummed around downtown all day. We tried to get into three different movies and were turned away every time. We were running out of things to do. We didn't want to hop back in the car and go to the hotel because we had prime parking and had hope we would see a movie. We basically went to Slackers five times and drank wine out of boredom.

Then the tornado sirens started blaring. The streets empties. Sallie and I were left in Top 10 Wines, sipping on a smoky red wine, watching the chaos outside. Not the worst way to spend apocalyptic weather. (Until you realized that we are in a building filled with glass.)

Saturday and Sunday were much more productive and we felt better about the money we spent on the tickets.

We finally saw some films, most of which were entertaining, but average. This gives short descriptions and reviews of everything we saw. Most of these films aren't out on DVD yet. Some even had their world premier at True/False.

-Fake it So Real: This is about Professional Amateur wrestlers in North Carolina. It was very interesting, sort of heartbreaking. You see the characters giving two weekends a month to entertain 10-40 people. They bust their bodies and are lucky to make $20. It really was carried by the characters who were all surprisingly charismatic and fairly intelligent. Went on for about 15 minutes too much.

-Secret Screening Purple: I can't talk about this one because it hasn't officially released yet.

-Resurrect Dead: This was one of the most interesting films of the festival. Was something out of the X-files. These weird messages pop up all around the world on the street and these guys become obsessed with finding out who is making them. I even asked a question of the director in front of a few hundred people. (He only gave me a half answer which was upsetting.)

-Campfire Stories: This wasn't a movie, but rather the directors (and sometimes subjects of the film) got up in front of a crowd and told us stories about the scenes that they didn't catch. There were stories that made you laugh, cry, just really made you marvel at these people's ability to tell a story. What made this better is we got smores.

-Knuckle: This film was about feuding Irish families and how they would have bare knuckle boxing fights in the street to settle differences. Real violent, but at the same time, these families are having short boxing matches instead of shooting each other on the street. If gangs were able to settle their differences this way, the world would be a better place.

-The Arbor: Pretentious without any true direction or subject. This is the only film we hated.

-The Burger and the King: There was a short about the civil rights movement at the beginning that was one of the best films we saw. Then the actual documentary was a series of interviews with the people that made Elvis' food. That man could eat!

-The Pruit Igoe Myth: This was one of the most heartbreaking of films. It tells the story of the demise of St. Louis. People moving out of the city after World War II caused lack of money because of loss of taxes, which then made the city start falling apart. It's hard to watch the destruction of something you have so much pride for.

-Shut Up Little Man: This started off strong. Two guys move to San Francisco and find that their neighbors are hilarious drunks. They record the guys fighting and start passing the tapes around. It becomes a big deal, thousands of people hear the tapes. This is about those guys trying to justify what they did. Gets really pathetic toward the end. It's a shame, started out so strong.

-Page One: Inside the New York Times: This was by far the best documentary of the festival. It not only showed you the inside workings of the New York Times, but David Carr, one of the main subjects, really gives hope for the future of journalism. I haven't seen Sallie smiling about her profession that much since she graduated.

-Bobby Fischer Against the World: Bobby Fischer, chess genius, bat-sh*t insane. This follows Bobby Fischer through his life and basically shows that when you re-wire your brain for something like chess, you can really mess yourself up.

The Story Behind a Picture

2011-02-18T11:02:00.000-06:00

Just like every picture has a story, every person has that carefree, coming of age, road trip, movie story. This picture represents one of those.

It's not often that I throw caution to the wind, but on The Get Up Kids were playing their 10th Anniversary Show in Lawrence Kansas. Not only was the show going to be recorded for an upcoming live album, but there had been rumors that the band was fighting and weren't enjoying touring anymore. Although none of us wanted to believe it, the Get Up Kids were on the verge of breaking up, and with their break up, the end of an era.

The show was completely sold out within minutes of being posted. I unfortunately wasn't lucky enough to purchase any before they sold out.

There wasn't a stub hub yet for us to scalp tickets, so our only options were blindly drive 2.5 hours and hope to scalp tickets, or not go.

Allie, Megan, and I decided we were going to try to get tickets. We were going to brave a drive we hadn't done before and go to Lawrence Kansas and see if we can scalp three tickets. It was all or none. We could end up spending $40 on two tickets and not beind able to get in because we couldn't find a third.

That week happened to be one of those epic 10" of snow, 5" of ice storms in the middle of winter, but still we pressed on.

On January 7th, 2005, we piled into Allie's Merker Scorpio, and headed west.

We got lost right around the Missouri/Kansas border because some engineers decided that Kansas City would have 23 exits within a two mile stretch. (I'm not kidding, There's an Exit 3M and an Exit 2G.) We got lost, turned into a Denny's for directions, and then couldn't get the car started again. After struggling for half and hour, the car finally started. We continued toward Lawrence... to find a toll road.

Luckily, we only had to drive on the toll road for a mile or so, and didn't occur any real toll.

We showed up outside of the Granada Theater with $30 a piece, two hours before the show, and immediately started pressing the line for tickets. Allie quickly scored one. We had found another, but the seller was reluctant to sell just yet. Just in case their friend showed up.

The line started lacking any fresh faces. There was no one new to ask for tickets. Doors were in twenty minutes and we were still two tickets down and we were getting desperate.

I went back to the reluctant potential seller, and she decided that her friend wasn't going to come anymore and sold the ticket to me for $10. We started offereing $30-40 for a ticket. People were ignoring our eyes. I now knew how it felt to be one of those people at the mall trying to get people to take surveys.

There's something I've noticed more about Get Up Kids fans more than any other fan on the planet. They are all excited and extremely loving when it comes to their music. As one of the most beautiful displays of Get Up Kid-ness, a girl came up to Allie and Megan as people were filling into the doors, and gave them a ticket for free. We tried to shove money into her hands, but she just wouldn't take it.

Success!

And there's only one more picture that sums the day up perfectly.

We were front row, staring into the eyes (and sometimes butt) or Matt Pryor, lead singer of the Get Up Kids.

Life Slowing Down for a Picture

2011-02-16T19:27:00.006-06:00

Every picture has a story behind it.

Even the most shortest, most insignificant story is still a story. It's absolutely impossible for a picture to not have a story.

Even though most hate taking them, pictures are invaluable. Life does slow down for a picture. It's like creating a shortcut to a memory. You might not actively be able to recall a story until you see the picture that jolts electricity through you brain.

Like this picture for instance. At first glance, this is a nice posed picture of me and grandma on my high-school graduation day. But this picture tells so much more.

This picture tells of a time when I still had limited responsibility. I was living a quiet, and at the time, boring white suburban life. Hell, there's even an American flag waving in the background. Doesn't get much more 1950s than that.

This is literally one of the last pictures of me before I was fully thrusted into the adult world. (This might even be one of the last pictures of me with hair.) Had you of asked me then what I thought about life, I probably would've complained. "No one understands me, I hate St. Charles, I want to burn Missouri to the ground, I'm going inside to play Playstation!"

If you ask me now what I think of this picture, the first thing that comes to mind is a blanket. A nice, comfortable place for me to live. A magical piece of fabric that protects me from monsters, keeps me warm, and can be used as a fort. That's how I look back on life then.

And the craziest thing is, hundreds of years from now, someone is going to be staring at their future hologram screen at this picture thinking, "Life was rough back then."

If only they knew...

Leave the Safety of your Heat

2011-02-10T22:17:00.003-06:00

The ice crunching beneath his feet is confirmation of his existence. He unplugged from the up to the minute notifications, emails, and that bank account flashing a number much lower than what it should be.

Only an hour before, the world felt like it was pushing down on his chest. It felt like everything was working against him and his wife. He left that all back in the house. In the safety of the heat. Tonight, he goes into the frozen world, away from all of that.

The street lights shine on the ice, glaring off foot prints created during the busiest moments of the day. But tonight, the world belongs to him. Tonight, he walks alone and decides to take the long way around.

He reflects on his problems. Somehow today, a demon was inside his body. He and his wife were looking for people to blame for every new obstacle that came up. It was so bad at one point that Steve Jobs was blamed.

Tonight, he doesn't need anyone to blame. Tonight, those problems are gone. He looks around. It's beautiful. He doesn't want the spring to come. He doesn't want everyone else to reclaim the world. But for tonight he thinks, "It's a great time to be alive."

There's a science to making a play-list for any situation. You have to be able to feel the emotion you're trying to emphasize. My playlist I simply called "winter" takes songs that are quiet and serene. Something that doesn't spoil the peace of a winter night. They tread the line of being depressing, but tug on the right positive heart strings to uplift you.

The Winter Playlist:(I tried to link each song to a You Tube video)
The Smashing Pumpkins - Thirty-Three
The Smashing Pumpkins - Rhinocerous
Weezer - Only in Dreams
Jimmy Eat World - Table for Glasses
Jimmy Eat World - A Sunday
Flogging Molly - The Story So Far
A Perfect Circle - Sleeping Beauty
A Perfect Circle - The Nurse Who Loved Me
Plain White T's - Hey There Delilah
Pete Yorn - All At Once
The Killers - Everything Will Be Alright
Wilco - Misunderstood
Sufjan Stevens - Chicago
Silverchair - Miss You Love
Death Cab for Cutie - Passenger Seat
R.E.M. - Nightswimming
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Porcelain
Radiohead - Exit Music (For a Film)
The Postal Service - Recycled Air
The Postal Service - The District Sleeps Alone Tonight
The New Amsterdams - Watch the World Cave In
Manchester Orchestra - Colly Strings
Elliot Smith - Needles in the Hay

Those Dreams I Said I Didn't Have...

2011-02-05T16:35:00.002-06:00

Yeah I had one. Remember when I said that virtually half my family gets these realistic psychic messages and I've always missed out. Well, I had one last night.

I was at my Grandma's house tearing apart some shelves in the basement. It was weird because my Grandpa was there, but no one seemed to think it was strange.

He was sitting at the kitchen table eating ham and mustard sandwiches. That detail is from real life. I have a vivid memory of helping him construct the very shelves I was tearing apart and on our lunch break we were served ham and mustard sandwiches. It was a weird combo I would've never put together on my own, but it was delicious and I remember it was my go-to lunch meat sandwich for the next many years.

At one point he flagged me over and told me I needed to follow him, he had something important to show me.

I followed him out onto my grandma's deck. He sort of bounced up and down in the back corner of the deck and the wood bowed, and whined, and bounced. He said, "This is dangerous. Make sure no one comes back here until it gets fixed." I told him I would.

Then the weirdest part is, he said, "I didn't die how you think I did." He wouldn't elaborate. Just kept saying it over and over again.

I called my mom today and told her. I had always believed my grandpa died of a heart attack, but she told me one of the possibilities was that he had an aneurysm but no one knew for sure. This was the first time that I had ever heard that theory.

The Ghosts of You and Me

2011-01-25T11:35:00.000-06:00

Sallie and I love this psychic named Chip Coffey. He has his own television show where he teaches psychic children how to handle their abilities and not to fear them called Psychic Children and often appears on another show called Paranormal Activity. Don't get me wrong, it's total trash TV, but Chip does appear to be legit.

About a month ago, Chip Coffey did a personal reading and ghost hunt at the Lemp Mansion. For $100, you got to hang with Chip all night. If you had deceased loved ones come through to talk to you, Chip was going to let it happen. If the Lemps were roaming the grounds, Chip was going to let you know about it.

I wanted to go, but money and a ride prevented it from happening.

There have been several times in the past few weeks where I have had very vivid dreams of me wandering around with Chip in the Lemp mansion. He always freezes at one point and turns slowly to me and says, "There's someone that wants to talk to you." Always at that point I wake up.

I've started to wonder if someone was supposed to deliver a message to me. What if I was supposed to be there?

It's really been nagging me. I don't feel like I can go to any psychic and get this rectified. I feel like it has to be Chip for some reason.

My family has an abnormal sensitivity to this sort of stuff. Probably why I'm so drawn to ghost hunting. There have been countless stories of relatives getting messages from beyond the grave. I never really got one of those messages (unless you count the picture of Larry's Tin Man from Christmas) and was always a little jealous. Ghost hunting seemed like a natural substitute.

The next time he comes anywhere close to St. Louis, I think I'm going to have to go.

Mountains and Plains Five States Away

2011-01-23T11:59:00.000-06:00

I was looking through my old blog on My Space and found this little gem. It was from when Sal moved to Myrtle Beach without me. I'm impressed by my past self. Really need to get writing again.

January 2nd, 2008
Mountains and Plains Five States Away

The clock struck new year
I'm alone in this place
Fireworks exploded
And I type away

Everyone else is drunk on delight

The lights are out
The mood is in
For writing what burns
Circles in my head

Everyone else toasts the world

Four states in between
Seems so far away
Plains and a mountain range
Tears me from you

Confetti and fireworks fall for them

This one can't compare with before
Drinks in hand, dance on the floor
Exactly one year ago
Was when I said "I love you"

Expressions don't express how much I miss you

The End of Circuitjerk

2011-01-23T01:39:00.002-06:00

Circuitjerk was born on September 9th, 2008 out of my ego for seeing my own written words out on the internet and for a deep seeded love of informing people about things I know a lot about.

Media Whore was the interim name for the blog that was going to be me discussing technology, videogames, comics, movies, television, podcasts, etc. Basically anything I would love to discuss with people.

Within a day I had emails coming from multiple friends wanting in on the blog. I think at the beginning we had something like five regular writers.

It spent only about three weeks as a super low budget, side-blog to this one. Neil and I decided to go legit. We purchased the Circuitjerk domain and for the next two and a half years, we were pretty good about getting at least three days worth of content a week on the internet.

We had months where there were 70 people going to the site a day and months were we only had 12-15. But we had fun doing it.

We had guest writers to fill gaps for a while, but eventually everyone faded away. It always seem to come back to me and Neil. Fans wanted to read more and more, and we felt our duty to the fans was to fill that content.

Professional videogame journalists say that its hard to hit deadlines, specially with some games taking 40-60 hours to complete. We didn't have the luxury of getting paid for eight hours a day to play and write about games. God I wish I did though.

We probably should've killed the site long before, but it's like when you have that really intense romance with someone that eventually fades. You don't hate the person, but you know its not the same. You're more in love with the memory. As with the song below, its the remorse of the loss of a feeling.

Neil wrote me tonight saying what we both sort of already knew. He could no longer continue the shame. We would end it on the Game of the Year 2010 list. The perfect punctuation of what has been a great memory in my life. It'll be something I never forget.

It's still incredibly hard to walk away. Sometime I've poured so much time and heart into. I've shamelessly promoted for years now. I guess my mind didn't want to grow up. I guess I thought I could always been a part of one of those sites that seemingly comes out of nowhere and is an internet sensation for just a blink of an eye. That's all I wanted was that recognition for that one millisecond in internet time.

So I guess all that there is to say is, "It's not you, its me. Maybe if we were in different places, with more support, this could've worked. But Circuitjerk, I still want to remain friends and hope that we can. With all my love..."

Sincerly,

Dan

www.circuitjerk.com

Hope for James

2011-01-20T23:04:00.002-06:00

Today snowed too heavy for Sallie or I to go to work. (In fact, as I write this, our street is a sheet of ice and almost not navigable.) We called in, but then realized we didn't really have any food. Rather than try to traverse via car, we walked to the grocery store.

We decided to stop by Subway and have a sandwich to stave off that awful empty stomach grocery shopping. You know, the kind where you come back home with Strawberry Banana nectar and a dozen clearance baking goods.

On the way, we passed a guy that asked for a quarter. He had his sob story about how his parents just died and he recently moved to St. Louis and was homeless. I shrugged my shoulders and explained I don't carry any money on me. (Which is true, it has to be tough to be homeless nowadays. With debit cards, I rarely have cash.)

He then looked Sallie and I in the face, with one of the most desperate glances, and asked if we could buy him a sandwich since we were going to subway and he hadn't eaten in a few days. Neither of us even hesitated. We invited him into Subway.

He introduced himself as James and shook both of our hands. It wasn't a creepy handshake like he was sizing us up or tweeking out on drugs. It was a handshake between on human and another.

In the florescent hum of the Subway lights highlighted James' shame. He said he would eat whatever we wanted to get him. He offered to get a 6" vegetable, which is the cheapest sandwich on the menu.

"James, I want you to get anything you want. If you want a 12", double meat sandwich with chips and a drink, you get it." He looked like he was going to have tears in his eyes. We ended up getting him a gift certificate for a few more sandwiches too. That way, at least for the time being, he wouldn't have to worry about where his next meal would come from.

James sat at the table next to us, chatting a little, asking if we knew of anyone hiring. He asked multiple times if we could give him our phone numbers so he could send us money when he did have a job. We refused, telling James that this meal was on us. He asked us to pray with him, and he asked God to bless us, and take care of him, Sallie, and me.

Sallie and I know how it is to have rough times. We've never been homeless, but we've been jobless. We know at a much lesser level than James, that fear of survival. Other people's charity is what kept us a float. To both of us, this simple gesture to a guy down on his luck, was us paying it forward for all those who helped us.

When James asked one last time if he could do anything to repay us, I just told James, just make sure when you're on your feet, you pay the favor to someone else in need.

2011 - A Year in Preview

2011-01-18T00:40:00.002-06:00

2010 is behind us and I have yet to talk about it.

Resolutions aren't a bad idea. A little cliche, but not a bad idea. Gyms are probably already filled with well meaning health nuts that will quit in 3 weeks and smokers have that one last cigarette.

I would love to say that this year I'm going to lose weight and get healthy, but I was already doing that last year. That's like saying, "This year, I'm going to have $1,000 in savings" when you already have $800 saved up. It's cheating.

So here's my resolution: Don't sweat the small stuff, you'll get through anything.

This year, we're hopefully going to get our finances in order. For the three years we've been married, we've been hit with financial disaster, year after year.

1st year: Sallie and I move to Myrtle Beach only to both get laid off 5 months later in the same week. We rack up a ton of debt moving back to Missouri and find that the job market has gone to hell. There are a few months where we don't have jobs, where the debt builds some more. We spend every cent we got for our wedding on paying bills. We start to recover toward the end of the year.

2nd year: As we start feeling better about our finances, Sallie gets bounced around between all sorts of shady jobs. We soon find out that companies really don't have to pay you much or play by the rules when the economy is crap. The debt stays stagnant. We aren't able to pay anything off, but even with buying a car and a scooter, we are able to keep it from building much.

3rd year: Because of some shady job Sallie had, we are in financial ruin thanks to some tax issues. After working overtime from January- March, we are able to get a house. We spend the entire tax credit on our taxes and again get to see a large amount of money disappear. Sallie soon falls ill, and we again fall deep into debt.

Even through all of that though, we've had it pretty good. We aren't rich, but well off. Most importantly, we're happy. (For the most part, everyone has a bad day) This is the year to start doing it smart. We're not going to buy stuff we don't need. We're going to kill half of our short term debt. And for every $100 worth of debt we pay, I want to put $50 into savings.

I looked at the budget, and even with the few trips we plan on taking this year, we can make it to happen with money leftover.

Has God Gone Online?

2011-01-09T19:58:00.002-06:00

A topic that has been coming up very often lately in my life is, "Is going to church relevant to everyone, anymore?" I know many people find comfort in the brick and mortar grace, but like (and this might be mildly blasphemous) most retailers, do we need physical building anymore? Specifically, this is something I've wrestled with since going to college.

I guess a little background.

I always hated going to church, but it used to be boredom. It was just a matter of spending an hour a week going through the motions and every now and then there were donuts.

Then I started showing physical symptoms of not liking going to church around 8th grade or so. (There was once, after standing and kneeling during the stations of the cross that the incense literally made me run outside and vomit) I think I can attribute this to my school at the time. Church was used as punishment.

I was in advanced Algebra (I think this is also why I don't like math or science) and it happened to be taught by the religious coordinator of our church. She was basically a sister, just without the formal training. Anytime I questioned God, or the church, or the Bible, I wouldn't get a conversation or an answer from her. Instead, I would get an answer like, "Because that's how it is." And she would see my question as a slight against God. My punishment would be to read that Wednesday's bible passage in front of church. (I was very good at this, which is another reason I think I was "in trouble" so often.)

I don't remember it ever bothering me then. It was more of an annoyance. But I think any psychiatrist would say that's an open and closed case of why now when I go to church I get so tense.

It's a weird tenseness too. Its only during the opening of the service, all the way up to the Bible reading. Which nowadays, most churches spend a good 3-5 songs at the beginning just rocking out and slide a greeting somewhere in there. I'm sure that it eases some people into the church, and that its done good things for Christianity, but its like nails on a chalkboard to me. (I get a similar reaction when I hear the birthday song.)

I also don't like the greeting part. I know its supposed to breed some sort of community with the church goers, but mostly what I see is people shaking hands with a customer service smile, then quickly leaving at the end of the service, only to scream at the same person as they leave the parking lot. I'm guilty too. I shook Sallie's hand today and one guy that had a sweet beard. I can't remember his name. That's one guy. ONE GUY'S NAME! What good has that hand shake done for us?

I don't like the community part of worship. I would love to volunteer with the church and do good in my community, but unless I"m going to be building a house for the poor on Sunday after service, I need to get out of church and get to the grocery store while I still have time.

I tense up to the point where my neck is stiff and I have a terrible headache by the time we're back in the car. I love the sermon, I love the Bible verses, but that music and the greetings... I just can't do it. I've tried taking deep breaths. I've tried spacing out. I've tried not giving my mind any warning. Nothing seems to stop this reaction.

So this week, in one of those classic moments where the movie protagonist stares into heaven and asks God "why!", I stared at my shower head and asked, "If church makes me so uncomfortable and tense, should I be going there? Should I be doing something else? How do I know there's not some evil influence trying to pull me from church?"

I've heard the argument for both sides, "Yes church is important" and "Sometimes God has different plans for your time." It seems to be an argument that changes from person to person. Some say the Bible says church is absolutely necessary. Other's say, "God will let you know what you're supposed to do. Trust in him." Then the retort, "All we know is what's written in the Bible." And then, "Well Paul didn't do anything Christian until God gave him a sign, so maybe you should listen to your body." It seems to go back and forth depending on which camp you're in.

Honestly neither side has convinced me yet. Every time I start leaning one way, the other side brings up a good point.

I didn't think much of it until today. I figured God would give me my answer in one of those ingenious, "A-ha" moments that only someone more wily than you can cause.

You see, I feel like I can get the same message listening to the sermon digitally and reading the bible on my own time.

This eliminates the music quandary I have.

This eliminates touching strangers.

But I figure if the sign I'm supposed to feel is at church, there's only one way for me to see that sign. I must go. So today Sallie and I went.

Please weigh in on this. Here's the answer I got.

The church was packed. We were forced to sit some close to strangers that not even Sallie that is half my size was comfortable.

We got to church a little late today and missed most of the music. Only heard about a song and a half. It was a good amount for me to tolerate. My tenseness was at a minimum. Besides being incredibly tired, I was feeling good today.

We went through the greeting that I described above and then someone came out and read a few passages from Job.

...Then, here's the weird thing (in two parts)

1) The sermon was about asking God questions and letting him answer. Don't just re-phrase the question until you feel like you got an answer you like. So exactly what I've been going through.

but then...

2) As to almost affirm that yes, in today's digital world, Jesus can be as affective online as seeing a live person, the pastor didn't present the sermon live. In fact, I don't think he was in the building. We watched on the 10 or so television screens, the taped sermon from the night before. A full church of a few hundred people, sat in uncomfortable chairs, staring at a television screen to get our message for the week. No one seemed weirded out about this. Everyone responded when the taped message asked for us to read along. Everyone laughed at all the jokes. I swear, there could've been a laugh track involved.

So here's the question I have:

1) Can I get the same sweet amount of savior per week by downloading the podcast of the sermon at the church I go to? I know this sounds like I'm being lazy, but it seems that all of the other parts of the service aren't for me. At least this way, I can reflect, rewind, read along with what's going on. I tend to take in more of the message and retain it for the week instead of just a few hours.

2) OR is this just a case of me asking this question so many times in so many different ways that I finally got the answer I was searching for?

Its something that I have to reflect on. Like with most divine question and answer sessions, there might not be one answer for everyone. I doubt I've gotten even part of the answer by now. That's the thing about God, we're not going to totally know him until we meet him after our Earthly suffering has ended.

The History of Christmas According to Dan (5 of 5)

2010-12-25T16:00:00.000-06:00

Christmas Tree

No one knows the exact origin of the Christmas tree, but the custom of decorating a tree can be traced to the 15^th century, Acne infused, Brotherhood of the Blackheads.

They set up a tree at their guild hall, then on the last night of the holidays, the tree was taken to the town square and people danced around it.

I'm assuming this was also the start of the tradition of getting blackout drunk on whiskey and eggnog and forgetting how lonely you are on the holidays.

Eventually, the different German guildes wanted to one up each other and had themselves a Christmas penis measuring contest and would erect trees outside of their guild halls. Sorry non-guild members, you don’t get to enjoy the tree. Now scram!

The tree was considered a Protestant tradition by the Roman Catholic Church, so it didn’t spread until around 1815, when the Catholics realized they couldn’t stop the tradition. So we did what we do best, took the tradition and did it better than anyone else.

How's that for welcoming the Christ child?

Obviously the Wise Men were the first to give presents on the very first Christmas, but it didn't really catch on. My guess is that Joseph and Mary kept it quiet because the amount taxable on gold and myrrh is astronomical. So this gift giving was kept quiet until Jesus could speak, and then, the humble man he was, he rarely bragged about the gold bars sitting in the bottom of his closet behind his skateboard and baseball card collection.

The tradition of putting presents under the tree can be traced to Queen Victoria’s family in the early 19^th century. It’s mostly a boring story about how rich kids got a ton of candy and presents under their tree. On of the princesses writes about it, but again, boring, rich aristocrat stuff. We read a ton of this in British literature in high-school.

Eventually department stores, cities, and people started bringing the gift giving and tree decorating traditions into their house.

Thanks to stores putting up Christmas decorations starting in July, and advancements in artificial Christmas tree technology, it’s now widely accepted to put the trees up starting around Thanksgiving.

Fun Christmas Fact: Initially the tree wasn’t brought in until Christmas Eve and promptly trashed on the 6^th of January because it was considered bad luck to do it any other way.

Some have suggested that we turn the period of time between Thanksgiving and Christmas into one holiday called “Thanks-mas-Giving” or “The Holy Creation of the Christchild and America the Christ Country, ‘Merica.”

This way we can save time arguing over when its too early to put lights on the house and it gives us an excuse to eat like disgusting pigs for the better part of 30 days. "A second helping, oh yes please. It's the holidays. I'll run it off in the summer."

The Warm Feelings of Christmas

I don't think any mortal can describe it better than Linus on my first post.

Christmas traditions have grown from a scary-ass Pagan holiday, to a celebration of the coming of Christ, to a commercialize shell of that celebration. Please, don't take this as my damnation of the holiday. It's my favorite. In my mind, whenever there’s a holiday where I get presents for someone else’s birth, is a great holiday that can never be ruined by anyone ever.

Fun Christmas Fact: I Love Presents!

Christmas is the time of year where you should love your enemies and friends just a little bit more than on an average day. It's the time of year when the Grinch and Scrooge become not only tolerable people, but heroes. It's the one time of a year when parents can lie to their children and you know what, its not only acceptable, but the world is in on the lie. What's wrong with giving a little hope and happiness during the coldest, darkest months?

Just remember that this is a celebration of love and togetherness. As a world we need to try our best to push the commercialism from our minds, then and only then, we will all have Christmases like those Coca Cola ads, where there’s a roaring fire, a loving family, and a sweet, delicious drink.

The History of Christmas According to Dan (4 of 5)

2010-12-24T16:00:00.002-06:00

Christmas Lights

Originally candles were lit in windows to show persecuted Christians where they could worship.

Then, in the mid-17^th Century, people started using small candles to decorate their Christmas trees. Surprisingly this wasn’t the most dangerous way to light your Christmas tree as you will see below.

That honor goes to the giant lightbulb Christmas lights first introduced in the 1880s, but not becoming popular until the 1940s-1950s. These giant bulbs would light dried trees on fire, get stepped on and slice people’s feet open with Christmas wounds, and probably gave off an unhealthy amount of radiation.

Today we use fairly safe, smaller lights. These use relatively little electricity and usually if they cause accidents, its user error. (See Christmas Vacation, 1989)

Fun Christmas Fact: Some British call their Christmas lights Fairy Lights because they are a gullible, wussy, mythology loving people.

Now onto the flying reindeer!

Flying Reindeer

The eight traditional reindeer were invented in the poem by Clement C. Moore called “A Visit from St. Nicholas.”

He probably got the idea from the eight legged horse, Sleipnir. There’s nothing to back that theory up, but Mulder would see eight reindeer, eight legs, and call shenanigans on Santa.

The original names of the reindeer are German and are Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder, and Blitzen. (Which mean Thunder and Lightning respectively.)

Fun Christmas Fact: Donder and Blitzen went on to be stars in American Gladiators

At one point in the early 1900s, L. Frank Baum tried to write that there were 18 different reindeer. Some names were Racer, Pacer, Fearless, Peerless, Ready, Steady, Feckless, and Speckless. His version didn’t catch on, sounding more like sleazy race horse names than cherished magical beasts.

Then, in 1939, Rudolph was invented by Robert L. May so that the Montgomery Ward department store had something to give to the Children at Christmas time. Rudolph has largely taken over as the most popular of the reindeer. This proves that the outcasts can rise up and become popular, giving mythological nerds and elves who wish to be dentists hope.

Besides an awful cash grab attempt in 1989, (see Prancer) no other reindeer have tried to steal the spotlight from Rudolph.

The History of Christmas According to Dan (3 of 5)

2010-12-23T16:00:00.000-06:00

The Elves

Santa didn’t always have elves, but he’s always had a tradition of surrounding himself with minorities.

Our good friend Sinterklaas has Zwarte Piet. At first glance, Zwarte Piet looks like a man dressed in black face. In fact, he probably was. He’s described as a black man, dressed in Asian clothing, and is St. Nicholas’ servant. To celebrate, many Dutch continue to dress like this jackass below.

Story has it that St. Nick used to be accompanied by the Devil, who’s occupation was to terrorize the bad little children. If you were a bad little Dutch child, you not only got coal in your stocking, but you would be water-boarded by Zwarte Piet as well. Basically imagine Dick Cheney in blackface. (Cause he shoots people on hunting trips, and there was all of that torture during those years, and he is like Darth Vader, get it? No? No one thinks that is as hilarious as me.)

Then, one year on Christmas Eve, there was a light-saber battle or something, and St. Nick triumphed over evil, shackled Zwarte Piet, and forced him into slavery.

What I’ve learned from this is that the Dutch saw Africans as the Devil, and since St. Nick was cool with having slaves, they should be too.

Fun Christmas Fact: In America, Zwarte Piet is known as "Black Peter." White Peter was tired of getting his calls and had to distinguish himself from the other Peter.

Another devil reference is Krampus, a part goat-human that accompanied the Austrian Santa. He essentially had the same role as Zwarte Piet, but is a hell of a lot scarier.

In other news, Austrian children are able to run on less than two hours of sleep a night during the month of December.

Santa then switched to using shorter, pointed eared elves. There’s not much of a background on why elves. As far as I can tell there wasn't a set in stone Santa mythology, and Louisa May Alcott tried to cash in on these elves she made up in the book called Christmas Elves. She never published, but none the less, the elves remain.

Fun Christmas Fact: The politically correct thing to call Elves are "Little Helpers."

My personal thoughts on why Santa changed to elves are as follows:

1) He needed help. Anyone could do this, even monkeys.

2) He needed protection from Orcs, Dragons, Yeti, and evil Wizards. The elves are known for their bow skills. It just makes sense to score a two for one deal. Get help making toys and protection.

3) Thanks to Abraham Lincoln and friends, it was no longer kosher to have slaves, even if it was the devil.

4) Krampus ... well look at Krampus. Do you want to be tied to that? Not the best way to extend business.

5) Santa needed to consolidate his work force. Times were hard and the business of giving things away wasn't exactly paying the bills. Outsourcing to the elves helped his bottom line and his stock holders concerns.

The History of Christmas According to Dan (2 of 5)

2010-12-22T16:00:00.000-06:00

So who is this Santa fella and how does he relate to the Christ child's birth?

Apparently he’s based off of Saint Nicholas of Myra, who was the bishop of Myra in the 4^th century. He was known for his gift giving skills to the poor. (He gave a lot of presents to keep poor women from becoming prostitutes.)

I thought to myself, St. Francis of Assisi and Robin Hood are both known for similar skills. What if they came along first? Then we’d have presents delivered by St. Francis, a man with a more righteous beard than St. Nick, or Robin Hood, who is a guy that favors tights to coats. It would’ve really affected my childhood. I would either love beards more than I already do or love tights... more than I already do.

So, the Dutch started the Santa Claus term, by having a fella named Sinterklass, deliver presents on December 6^th. Sinterklaas means “The Good Saint”, but I was thinking it sounded more like a German Death-Metal Band, like Rammstein.

Side note: There are many parrarels drawn between Santa and Odin, a major Norse god, who was known cross the sky with his hunting party once a year. Children would leave carrots and straw in their boots to feed his horse Sleipnir, an eight legged horse that could leap long distances. For the best take on this, listen to Smodcast #66.

Then, in the 17^th century, Sinterklaas was merged with the British Father Christmas, and thus a sweet, skinny, hippy, robed dude named Santa Claus was born.

More and more, decade after decade, Santa gained weight. Then in the 1930s, Coca Cola pretty much immortalized the chubby Santa Claus we know today in an ad campaign. This was probably to show all of those people that were starving during the great depression that Santa was eating fine, and had unlimited supplies of Cocaine filled soft drinks to keep him delivering presents all night long.

Of course technology has tainted the purity of Santa Claus a bit. We’re like hungry paparazzi outside of Paris Hilton’s house. We must know what Santa is doing at all times. Now Santa is tracked by Norad, can receive email, and even has a GPS locator cell phone app or two.

I’m beginning to think Futurama was correct, and Robot Santa will soon blow up bad little boys and girls with rocket launchers.

The History of Christmas According to Dan (1 of 5)

2010-12-21T22:02:00.003-06:00

We all know the story of the birth of the Christ child that is the basis for this holiday known as Christmas. (Literally meaning Christ's Mass)

If you don't know the story, the cliff notes version goes something like this, virgin conceives child, is told this child is Christ, God says its going to be a rough road, Joseph and Mary make it to Jerusalem, they get kicked out of some hotels, end up in a barn, Jesus is born. There's all sorts of animals like a Disney movie and three really intelligent guys come with gifts. This is the beginning of salvation, grace, Christianity, acts of miracles, and the best selling book of all time.

For a full detailed account, refer to Matthew 1:18-25; Matthew 2:1-12; Luke 1:26-38; Luke 2:1-20.

Or let my buddy Linus tell you all about it:

In this series, I'm going to focus more on the traditions, commercialisms, and mythology revolving around the holiday.

So where do the holiday traditions come from? What about Santa Claus? What the hell is a Krampus?

Over the next few days, the history of these events will be explained through my filter of what I've read on Wikipedia.

St. Louis Noir

2010-12-21T00:17:00.003-06:00

I went for my daily lunch break walk today and had a hard time going back to work.

Everything was overcast. I pulled my trench-coat closer as the wind kicked up. It was just cool enough for me to need a hat, but not cold enough for it to be ridiculous that I was outside. Something like 44 degrees.

I was only a six shooter and a cigarette short of being a private eye.

I'd recline in my chair with my feet kicked up on a dark oak desk. A pretty lady would wander into the room, crying, spilling some sob story about how gangsters took off with her husband.

My ceiling fan would cast shadows across her blond hair and fur coat. I'd think, "She seems to be a good kid, and I've got rent due." I'd take the case.

After running into several seeming dead-ends in the case, I'd get a big break when the bad guy showed up behind me with his gun pulled. There would be a scuffle. He'd get a couple of lucky licks in, but then I'd sock him in the nose sending him to the ground. His gun lays on the floor between us and we both jump for it.

We desperately try to wrestle the gun out of each other's hand until it accidentally goes off. The camera freezes on both of our faces. We're in shock. Who was shot. The camera lowers to our guts and it was him that was shot. He collapses next to me as I sit on the floor and light up the cigarette.

The police show up and I tell that little lady that it was her Uncle Joe that hired hitmen to take out her husband. When she asks if he was server justice, I show her my gun and merely reply, "You Betcha," cool and calm as I walk off camera.

Then I realize I'm once again sitting in my cubical, in front of my computer, resolving tech issues.

Sigh...

Elevator Etiquette

2010-12-14T23:22:00.002-06:00

I almost always take the stairs.

I'd like to say its a way for me to get just a little more exercise in the corporate world, but the truth is, I don't know how to handle elevator etiquette.

We've got something like 30 elevators in our complex, but still rarely do I ever get an elevator to myself.

The problem I have is the situation forces you to invade and have your personal space invaded. You are trapped in a small metal box with a bunch of germy, sweaty, strangers all looking to make small talk.

Guess what, I don't want my time wasted. I will instead listen to this podcast and learn something or enjoy something. Believe me, its much better than talking about the crappy cold weather or "how those Cards are doing."

People try to get on the elevator before everyone already on the elevator get off. You get this awkward traffic jam where everyone apologizes, but no one really does anything to solve the situation.

Then you have the weird conversation. It can go either way. Either two people step onto the elevator and in mid-sentence stop talking until you get off. Makes you feel like you're really make their day horrible because they have to wait three floors to start talking again.

Then there's the people that lock themselves into the elevator and continue with their conversation and pretend like you're not there. In which case, they are the rude bastards.

Then there's the frantic button pushers. The ones that also hate crowded elevators. They're the ones that press their floor and then keep pressing the close door button a million times thinking it'll make the door shut faster. (This same phenomenon also happens at crosswalks.) Interesting note, 90% of the time that button is disabled unless you have the key to the control box.

Here's how I solve it. I usually have my headphones up loud, press my floor, and step into the opposite back corner so no one asks me to do anything. If they start looking for eye contact, I quickly look at my phone and pretend like there's something interesting on there.

Yes, everyone, I am what is wrong with the world.

Thoughts on Wikileaks

2010-12-06T22:52:00.000-06:00

You haven’t been able to escape Wikileaks in the news lately. You know, that website that has been posting leaked U.S. military documents over the past few weeks. They also released the famous “Collateral Murder” video a few months back in which a US helicopter guns down two famous, unarmed journalists.

I’ve been back and forth about what I think of Wikileaks.

On paper, they sound like a necessary counter balance to world powers. They could do a lot to force the governments of the world to answer questions, keep them honest. Every government does things that are criminal to get the job done and sometimes they should answer for it.

But then there is the argument that ignorance is bliss. And it often is. I like thinking that North Korea is the bad guy, even if it’s blindly. I like thinking we’re these heroic world problem solvers, even though I know that’s not always true.

As more and more documents are posted, I’m beginning to worry about the ramifications of Wikileaks. Yes, the arguments about diplomats, contacts, and locations of bases being exposed have already been made by every military and government leader. They’re valid arguments and I’m sure it’s going to cause more than a few people to lose their lives.

What I’m seeing now though really scares me.

We’ve seen documents in which opinions on personalities are revealed. Weaknesses of world leaders, ways to win their favor, and secret packs they made with other leaders. Hilary Clinton is calling the French and Germans wusses, while the ineptness of George W. Bush and Tony Blair are shown in high resolution. Saudi Arabia asks the United States to hurt several rivals while their highest earners funnel money to terrorists. Today it was leaked that NATO and the United States had a plan to defend the Baltic Sea from Russia if they were to attack. We already had strained relationships with them and were finally mending it.

After the events in the past few months like bombs trying to be transported in printer cartridges or even the artillery shellings North and South Korea unloaded on each other only a week, I feel like this can only hurt the world. The probably less than 100 volunteers with Wikileaks could bring this world to war again.

Sometimes secrets are best kept secret. While I don’t like authority figures, I trust that my government is trying to keep me alive because it’s a sick parasitic relationship we have. We both need each other. I need them to protect me, make sure I have necessities, and to keep dumb people in check. I on the other hand, give them currency and labor. I’m the small voice that tells them what I like and what I don’t through voting. Even though, people and government alike get lost in calling each other liberal and conservative like they are both bad words, I prefer those petty squabbles than full out war.

I guess what I’m saying is that if someone were to make Julian Assagne disappear, I wouldn’t be upset. I don’t want him killed because he will only be made a martyr, but if he were put in prison and allow people to forget him, I would be happy.

The Evil Twin

2010-11-24T20:11:00.000-06:00

We’re creatures of habit. Do you remember in grade school, the first time the teacher didn’t have assigned seating. You felt liberated. This must’ve been what it was like when we declared freedom from the British. Fireworks went off, anthems were sang, and the stars and stripes flew high.

And then you picked your seat and stayed in that seat the rest of the year.

If any new kid came in, and you found him in your seat, something boiled inside you. You started sweating. You’ll take another seat for now, but you won’t feel comfortable the rest of the day, and mentally note that you need to get to school earlier tomorrow, so you can reclaim what is yours.

There’s a spot that the guards let me park that is near the entrance to the garage. I’m supposed to be able to park in bike racks according to the rules set for motorized scooters, but their bike racks are in bad places. So we have an understanding that I can park in this special spot off to the side.

Recently someone started riding their motorcycle to work. Not only did some jerk start riding his motorcycle at the end of November, but he started parking in my spot so that I have to park 3 levels up in the garage. I just want to kick his motorcycle down.

I’ve been dealing with that over the past two weeks. I was coping pretty well actually, until today.

There’s one particular shower that I like to use at the gym. It has the best temperature control and seems to get the best water stream from it. It’s also off to the side, so not a lot of people use it. (Plus I go to the gym before the lunch rush usually starts.) So I don’t have disgusting body hair all over the shower or that bandaid that always is on the ground.

Today someone was in there.

My brain stopped thinking about motor functions and my present surroundings. Instead, I thought, it’s the same guy. I have an evil twin trying to inconvience me in life. Soon I’m going to come home from work and he’ll be sleeping on my side of the bed. Or he’s going to finish off the milk and leave the carton in the fridge.

Then I went into another fantasy where I jump kick him through the shower curtain. I grab his head and bash it into the tiles of the wall.

Then I came back to reality. Scared that I had wandered into my fantasy so long. Scared because for 5-10 seconds my brain had its own thought processes. I almost expected to come to with blood on my body and an unconscious man laying at my feet.

So I went to another shower and felt the at first too cold and soon too hot sting of an awful shower.

Well played evil twin… well played

Snowdrops

2010-11-22T20:59:00.002-06:00

Dear November 22,

I don't know if you got the memo, but most of us expect certain things from you. 1) It should be below 45 degrees. 2) If you choose to bring awful weather, it should be snow, ice, and sludge.

Currently it is 75 degrees outside and there's a thunderstorm. I probably should not see lightning and thunder and I definitely should not be seeing rain right now.

See, I ride a scooter. It's hard to ride in the rain. It's especially hard when my mask is fogging up and there's Christmas lights everywhere that reflect off the fog completely blinding me from the road.

Just thought I would pass the memo on so you could correct this by tomorrow.

Thanks
Dan

Hello old friend

2010-11-14T12:15:00.002-06:00

I've been busy lately... or course that's what I always say.

I find myself talking to myself a lot lately. I've been so incredibly busy since around February, that I've felt like I've been losing myself. I've become a 9-5er (errr rather 11:30-8er) and I come home, I plop down on the couch, my mouth hanging open, and play games until Sallie gets home.

Then a few weeks ago something popped inside my brain. A short circuit, or rather a jump start as I like to think of it. I've returned. My internal conversations have gone something like this.

"Hello old friend, I've missed you. We really should catch up. "

Here's the thing, I've had time to write in the past couple weeks, but I've had a creative burst lately. I've been fine tuning old stories I had, started a few new ones. I've been missing this creative burst since we left Myrtle Beach, but now its back with a vengeance.

I've been stuck on this world where all those things that most people say are make believe, are a part of society. I've started a few stories in this universe where there are super heroes, vampires, and fable characters are functioning parts of this society. The problem is, I always wanted to write the next great American novel. (Of course, every writer wants to do this) You don't normally write the next great American novel with the Wolfman running around.

Most artists aren't appreciated during their time, well writers of Science Fiction and fantasy aren't often recognized during their great grand children's time.

You either score like a J.R.R. Tolkien or people form a cult around your writing like L. Ron Hubbard.

So I'm glad the creative streak is back. These ridiculous fantasy stories seem to be where my brain is at right now, so I'll ride this out and see where it takes me. At least I'm more likely to have a movie made based on the book than people that write those serious stories.

That Time of the Year

2010-11-06T00:32:00.000-05:00

Its that time of the year again. The time of over eating, present giving, and Christ childs being born. To those of you that have been asking, here is my list. You'll notice there's more practical stuff on here this year. I know, I surprised myself a little. In no particular order, here is the list.

Comic Books

Hellblazer: Fear and Loathing – Garth Ennis

Dark Knight Returns – Frank Miller

Preacher Vol. 2: Until the End of the World – Garth Ennis

Marvel Civil War

Resident Evil Volume 1

Resident Evil Fire and Ice

Books

Metro 2033 – Demetry Glukhovsky

A Cook’s Tour: Global Adventures in World Cuisines

Medium Raw: A Bloody Valentine to the World of Food and People Who Cook - Anthony Bordain

Harry Potter Hardback Books 1-6

Videogames

Intelligent Cube – PS1

Rock Band 3 – Xbox 360

Civilization V – PC

Valkyria Chronicles 2 - PSP

Dead Space 2 – Xbox 360

Kitchen Stuff

Square – flat griddle

Hanging Wine Glass Rack

Knife Magnet

Hand Blender with attachments

Crockpot

Sauce Pan – Medium

Wok

Blu-rays

Borne Trilogy

The Pacific

Lord of the Rings Trilogy

Iron Man 2

Batman Begins

Micellaneous

Kindle

Laptop (Dell gift certificates toward a laptop)

Resident Evil Hunk Action Figure

Resident Evil Zombie Action Figure

Vinyl Clearer

Good turn table

Albums

Ramones - Ramones

Greenday – 21^st Century Breakdown

David Bowie – Ziggy Stardust

Against Me! – Searching for a Former Clarity

New Amsterdams – Kill or Cured

Perfect Circle – Mer De Noms

Tell Me Your Story

2010-10-14T00:31:00.002-05:00

I had an extra lawnmower that has given me multiple issues over the year I had it. About six weeks ago, the lawnmower I inherited from the parents stopped working. I just couldn't get the engine to turn over. It was probably something simple like a spark plug or dirty filter, but I have another lawn mower that I like using better, and I don't have time to actually try to figure out the machinery. (Although I should have just tinkered to win some man points.)

So, Sallie and I decided we needed to get it out from under our porch and get it to someone else. Why let a perfectly broken lawnmower rust and rot?

So I was going to post it on Craigslist for $20 or some small amount of money that couldn't possibly be haggled. For those of you that don't know, I hate dealing with the people that frequent Craigslist. (See my post if you would like to know the reasons.)

Lately, I've been thinking I need to do some sort of charity or volunteer work. Then it dawned on me. I could really help someone out.

So I posted to Craigslist that I would give the lawn mower away for free. I asked that it go to a house that could really use it.

Within 10 minutes I had something like 30 emails. Most the replies were simple, "I'll take the lawn mower if you still have it." There were a few people that did some generic

Then, about six messages in there was a guy that simply said, "If the lawn mower is available, I would be interested in it. I lost my job a few months back and have been making ends meet by buying household appliances, fixing them up, and selling them."

I thought back to two years ago when Sallie and I were out of work and how desperate we were to make a few dollars. If I could give this guy a lawn mower, he could fix it, and sell it for say $50, maybe that would mean one more bill paid.

So I gave it to him. He came by our house, was very grateful. He had a little girl with him, probably six, in a soccer uniform, with freckles all over her face and she told me thank you. It felt good. Just a simple act in a "One man's trash is another man's treasure" situation, and I felt good and some stranger felt good.

I want to do more. Tell me your story, tell me how I can help you, and I will be there.

Lord, Save Us from your Followers!

2010-10-11T21:01:00.003-05:00

I just watched a documentary on Netflix called "Lord, Save Us from your Followers." I expected this to be a Michael Moore like condemnation of the Christian faith. Was really just wanting to watch it for some cheap entertainment, but soon found that it was more than that.

The director and writer of the documentary is a Protestant, a believer, on a quest to find out why exactly Atheists, Agnostics, and other religions seem to have an extreme distaste for Christians.

Some of what was discussed I found extremely interesting.

-Most people that have issues with Christianity actually like Jesus and what he stands for. Their beef is with the way Christians try to spread their word through condemnation, fear tactics, and yelling the loudest.

-The abortion numbers for Christians are relatively high. The documentary discusses how the porn industry, Hollywood, and media are all to blame, but then asks the question, "Isn't the home to blame?" Those industries do what sells. So if sex is what sells, wouldn't people learn their craving of sex from their home as a child?

-The documentary also asks people if they think that Jesus would be Democrat or Republican, liberal or conservative. Most said neither, he's above that. So then why does faith become such a large part of political campaigns? Because its easy votes.

-The documentarian takes an idea from a book I read called "Blue Like Jazz" and sets up a confessional in a particularly un-Christian event. Donald Miller set up a confessional booth during a "Pagan" festival at his college in Portland Oregon. The documentarian, Dan, set up a similar booth at a Pride Festival. He started each confessional with asking forgiveness on behalf of the church for treating people like trash, sub-humans. In just about every instance the people were taking aback, connecting with Dan, and there was actually a dialogue, empathy, and confusion as to why they were pushed out of the church.

I just found some of those points interesting. They're things I've always sort of expected, but never had anyone go to the streets and try to find out.

Conquered Betches!

2010-10-03T16:06:00.002-05:00

I did, actually did it. 13.1 miles. With all the zigzagging I did, it was properly closer to 14 miles.

First some thanks:

-Wifey - For forcing me to run a bit faster than I would've for the first four miles.
-Gu - This amazing invention of high fructose corn syrup, vitamins, and sugar really helped me get through the race.
-Foo Fighters - Dave Grohl's voice and the power guitars of the Foo Fighters pushed me through miles 5-12.
- The girl that most definitely broke her ankle around mile 6. I'm sorry it happened to you, but knowing that I wasn't having the worst marathon out of anyone really helped.
- 11 AM. I kept saying this time in my head over and over again because I knew that if I weren't already home, I would be on my way home by then. It's a good time of day.

Some things I don't like:
-4:40 am. The time I dragged myself out of bed. I hate it. There were stars out still.
-37 degrees - This is the temperature we hung out in for an hour before the race.
-The hill around Hwy 370. That hill sucked. Seriously.

I finished the race in 2:33:56. A bit quicker than the 2:45 I had estimated and hoped for. Sallie killed me. She finished around 2:12:00. Here's where I raced:

http://www.fleetfeetstlouis.com/lewisandclarkmarathon/course.htm

I don't know if I would do another half. I would need to be in much better shape. I would probably do anything under 10 km. We'll have to see through. Sallie plans on doing this much much more often.

Sonic Death Monkey!

Car Update

Best Saturday EVER

Car Trouble, Know What I'm saying?

Resolutions - 1 week later

Resolutions

Just Testing

A 2011 Retrospective

Injury Update

I Am Me Because I Was 8

Wedding Day

Day Out

What the hell day is it?

One of those days where life gets away from you...

10 Week Update

The Christmas List

Oh the crazies you see at physical therapy.

Quick Update

Blues!

Recovery Day 42

Recovery Day 40

Recovery Day 31 Another Field Trip

Recovery Day 29

Where Were You?

Recovery Day 20 Field Trip

Recovery Day 19

Recovery Day 14

Recovery Day 12

Recovery Day 10

Recovery Update

Reasons my Wife is Awesome and Recovery Day 4

Recovery Day 3

Recovery Day 2

Painkillers and Surgery

Fake Money and Passions

The Checkbook that Won't Go Away

The Scenarios in Which I don't Help

The Instruments of Yesterday

Food Porn

Neighbor Politics

The Yearly Birthday List

There's a New Kitten in Town

Wait... You Did What?

Google +

To the Flea Market!

The Perfect Run

A Long Sunday

The After Vacation Gut

Ultramarathon Man

The James Bond Shower

Rapture and the Macho Man

Why I hate summer

The Fun Parts of Arizona

The Burden of Travel

Naan

Happy Free Comic Book Day 2011

Just Saying

The Musician without Rhythm

Canoe Away for True Happiness

Fallout Shelter

Bring Out the Zamboni

Learning to be a Man

Proposition E Passes

Vote of Die!

Oh, the Things we Keep

Overcoming the Things that Baffle

A Rant About Current Technology Trends ... if you will

True/False Festival 2011

The Story Behind a Picture

Life Slowing Down for a Picture

Leave the Safety of your Heat

Those Dreams I Said I Didn't Have...

The Ghosts of You and Me

Mountains and Plains Five States Away

I was looking through my old blog on My Space and found this little gem. It was from when Sal moved to Myrtle Beach without me. I'm impressed by my past self. Really need to get writing again.January 2nd, 2008Mountains and Plains Five States Away

The End of Circuitjerk

Hope for James

2011 - A Year in Preview

Has God Gone Online?

The History of Christmas According to Dan (5 of 5)

I was looking through my old blog on My Space and found this little gem. It was from when Sal moved to Myrtle Beach without me. I'm impressed by my past self. Really need to get writing again.

January 2nd, 2008
Mountains and Plains Five States Away